Page 75

Or…Court had helped himself to my panties.

That perverted little thief.

Instead of getting angry, though, it made me smile. He could keep them if he wanted them so badly.

Once every piece of clothing was tossed onto the bed, I took out my little toiletry bag, my yarn, the latest knitting project I’d been working on—a rainbow potholder—and my memory foam slippers.

I let the slippers drop to the floor and slid my feet inside them.

Court could keep my underwear as my gracious thanks for returning these. I wouldn’t even say anything.

But I did want my knitting needles back.

I had a potholder to finish.

TWENTY-ONE

The rest of the week passed without me seeing much of Court at all because he had to work.

He and Cade both worked for some local construction company, and then without me even asking, he told me everything about growing up in this town, everything about Frank and the Sainted, what they did for the town, how Frank was like a father to them.

I now had a few more pieces to Court’s puzzle, and learning all of that made me want to uncover every single one of the secrets he was keeping. I wanted him to give me every bit of information about himself. I wanted to know everything.

I didn’t know what was happening to me. Court was changing me, slowly and surely, and I was growing accustomed to having him around. Any room I walked into, he was the first person I looked for. Every time he was near, I could just feel him. His eyes were always on me, the warmest, most comforting sensation.

Worst of all, I was starting to believe him. He followed through every promise with actions that proved he meant what he said.

The constant reminders to myself that this was transitory felt hollow.

But sometimes they had weight to them. When Court would disappear into the basement with the rest of the guys, the feeling of being left out rose to a staggering crescendo that wouldn’t let up. I had to tell myself on repeat that I wasn’t disappointed. I wasn’t offended. I wasn’t actually part of their little group and nor would I ever be.

I didn’t want to be.

My entire life had been spent pushing people away and not forming attachments to anything or anyone. I didn’t need to form them now, and I refused to go where I wasn’t invited. Where I wasn’t wanted.

I did wonder what they were doing down there, though. I almost went down there several times and had to distract myself with going through the study material he’d given me and nosing around the rest of the house.

I’d puttered around the kitchen for a while, looking through every cupboard and drawer for something sharp. Under his sink, there was an entire arsenal of cleaning supplies, including a lot of bleach. I could make ammonia bombs if I wanted to.

Then I’d walked around the living room, the family room, and the den that led out to a back porch. He kept everything neat and disgustingly clean. I slid my finger along the mantle over the fireplace and didn’t find a speck of dust.

I went upstairs and looked inside the room that wasn’t Cade’s—the door was always shut, and I wanted to know what was behind it.

To my surprise, it was some kind of office. Definitely Court’s, by the way everything was so neatly arranged. After that, I tried to locate his hiding spot for the plastic forks and the regular silverware, but wasn’t able to. Then I’d gone to my new favorite spot: outside on the back porch. He had a wooden rocking chair out here, so I listened to it creak while idly rocking.

I really liked his property. He had a lot of land that seemed to stretch out to the horizon, and there was a big copse of trees next to a shed that looked like it had seen better years. Beyond that was a field of tall grass, and even further out was an endless forest that surrounded the property. I could even see mountains in the distance.

A light breeze rustled the leaves of the trees, scattering the streams of sunlight that broke through the branches. It was peaceful out here. Like time had stopped, or at least slowed down. There was a laziness to everything that relaxed me. I kicked one foot up onto the porch railing in front of me, pushing off it to move the chair back and forth.

I had never really been able to just sit like this, with nothing but the sound of the wind drifting through the leaves and the grass. As I sat, I thought about what Brooks had told me. What Court had told me. I hadn’t ever really cared about other people’s problems before—hell, I hardly even acknowledged my own. But knowing Court was doing all of this for multiple reasons—reasons I couldn’t deny were decent and good and right—had shifted something inside me. Had whispered to a part of me that had lain dormant for so long, I thought it was dead.

When I’d moved to Marion, it had been on impulse—like every decision in my life. Had I known I was going to fall into the clutches of a sadistic psychopath, I never would have gone there.

Tom should have been enough to make me leave, with his wandering hands and nasty words. If I had enough self-respect, I might have. But I was severely lacking in those departments, and I had to admit that I was as bad as Jay in letting him off the hook.

I never really cared how I was treated or who I was working for, as long as the money kept coming. When had I become the barest shell of a person? When had money become the only driving force in my life? Even with Court, I’d thrown caution to the wind and agreed to work with a man who had kidnapped me, for fuck’s sake.

But Court’s eyes had never held the kind of malice I’d seen in Thorne’s. Court’s eyes were sharp, observant, and often gleaming with amusement and a warmth that heated me from my toes up. He was intelligent and driven by a need to save his brother. To avenge the women Thorne had wronged, to save the ones he might target in the future by ending his existence. He was driven by justice and the desire to make the lives of those around him better. He’d shown me more kindness in a short time than I’d ever been given.