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Giggling, Tierney rounded the island. “Why don’t you make us some tea while I change this little munchkin’s nappy.”

Fifteen minutes later, we were settled on the couch, Maura in her baby bouncer, nappy fresh, and smacking at the unicorn dangling from the attached mobile. I sipped at the chamomile rose tea I’d found in Tierney’s cupboard, feeling a wee bit unsure about what would come out of my friend’s mouth. Because I knew it would be something.

“I’m just going to get to it because you of all people appreciate straightforwardness.”

I braced. “Okay?”

“We’ve all noticed you’re avoiding Forde. Even more than you were avoiding him before what happened in Aberdeen. And we’ve all noticed how upset he is about it. Did something happen between you two? Because you can talk to me.”

“It’s fine. We’re fine,” I said. Maybe it was because the subject of Forde was the most vulnerable one for me. Maybe even more so than the horror show that was Greig Wallace.

Tierney sat back against the opposite couch, curling her feet under her as she clasped the hot mug between her palms. Her gaze was at once searching and considering. “You know, Cammie, for as long as I’ve known you, you’ve been this outspoken, blunt-talking, confident woman I’ve always really admired. But I guess I started to realize after a while of knowing you that you’re open about surface stuff, yet you’re pretty closed off when anyone tries to get a sense of your deeper emotions. Now and then, you’ll let something out that is meaningful, but you cover it up with a joke. And that’s fine,” she hurried to reassure me. “I love you for who you are. But I also worry about you. I worry that you’re keeping everything inside and handling everything all by yourself … and that one day it might explode out of you in the worst way.”

My pulse increased with every word out of my friend’s mouth because she wasn’t wrong.

“Do you know you’re the first real girl friend I’ve ever had?”

Tierney considered this. “I guess I kind of knew that. There was no one else in town you seemed close to, which I wondered about, considering you’ve lived here your whole life.”

“I was always told I was too much as a kid. Too in people’s faces. Too overly enthusiastic about everything. Too blunt and honest.” I shrugged, feeling that old ache in my chest. “The people I was closest to were Quinn, Forde, and Taran. Taran was more Quinn’s than mine and then she left and didn’t come back for twenty years. So, I just had my brother and Forde until you came along and brought London with you. Then Taran returned. But before you lot, I didn’t really have proper girlfriends to hang out with. I’ve always felt a wee bit of an outsider here, which is probably why I try to know everything about what’s going on so I feel more connected.” I surprised even myself with that last part of the confession.

“Why did you stay here if you felt that way?”

“Quinn.”

“And Forde,” Tierney guessed.

I nodded because there was no point denying it. “And the island. I think you grow up here and the life either seeps into your blood or you can’t wait to get your feet on the mainland. Despite everything, I loved growing up on this island.”

“With Forde,” she pushed.

And now I knew exactly where this conversation was going.

Tierney sighed at my silence. “I won’t keep pressing if you don’t want to talk about it, but I’ve always thought from the first time you introduced me to Forde that there was this electricity between you that definitely hinted at something romantic. And I just want you to know that as fond as I am of Forde, I’m your friend, Cammie. If you ever need someone to talk to about it, I’m here and I’m a vault.”

Like a tidal wave hovering just off the horizon, a flood of emotions crashed over me and the force of them hit the guarded wall I’d built so long ago. It crumbled, and the words spilled out of me.

“Forde was the first guy I ever slept with.”

Tierney choked on her sip of tea, and I winced as she spluttered and coughed.

“Sorry.”

She waved me off as she cleared her throat and then reached over to soothe Maura who stared at her wide-eyed. “I’m all right, baby,” she assured her, though her voice was croaky from the tea going down the wrong pipe. Her gaze flew to mine. “You lost your virginity to Forde?”

I wrinkled my nose. “Ugh, why do we use that phrase? Lost implies negative connotations, like people are wrong to have sex. Ugh. I didn’t lose my virginity and Forde didn’t take it. I was a virgin before I slept with him and then I wasn’t after I slept with him.”

Tierney’s shoulders shook with amusement, her hazel eyes dancing. “You are so right. I’m never going to use that phrase ever again, and it’s now going to annoy me in every single romance book I read from here on out.”

I chuckled. “Sorry.”

“Let’s not get distracted from the momentous thing you just confided. You slept with Forde. How many times?”

I couldn’t help but laugh at how intrigued she was. “Once.”

Her expression fell. “Why just once?”

“Because …” I teetered now as I was on the verge of saying something out loud I hadn’t ever shared with another human being. “Because I loved him.” I shrugged sadly, holding back the memories of how much it had all hurt back then. “I spent the summer I turned eighteen planning my seduction of Forde Dallas. I flirted with him and he flirted back. Then on his twenty-first birthday, I threw him a party, wore a skimpy dress I thought he couldn’t resist, and when everyone else left, I just went for it.”