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“No, I’m sorry. I was distracted. What did you say?”

Normally, I could put on a poker face to hide my emotions, but I had been keeping this secret from my family for a while, and it was getting harder to hide.

“What’s going on? And don’t say it’s nothing because you look like you’re about to cry,” River pointed out.

I closed the apps on my phone and set it on the table. I had been debating whether or not I wanted to say anything, but it was becoming harder and harder to hide. Truthfully, I was starting to become afraid.

“Someone has been stalking me.” I blurted out.

“What do you mean? Is someone trolling you online? Are they harassing you? Do you know who the bitch is?” Triniti tossed out a bunch of questions.

I exhaled, then told them everything I had been experiencing. When Rondell died, I received death threats and messages daily to the point that I had to deactivate all of my social media pages and change my number. I stayed offline for a year until I finally decided to create new pages and start over.

Recently, I’ve been receiving weird messages again. At first, I thought it was harmless trolling until they began sending news articles about the day Rondell killed himself. I immediately blocked the accounts, but three more popped up with the same posts. I made my page private, but it didn’t stop there.

“It started with messages about Rondell and stuff, but lately things have started to get weirder.”

“What do you mean by weird?” Triniti probed.

I debated whether I wanted to say anything, but since I had already opened my mouth, I had no other choice. My cousins weren’t gonna let it go.

“I’ve been getting weird letters and packages in the mail. When I checked the shipping address, it turned out to be the address of the campus.”

“What the hell is going on? What was in the packages, and why the hell is this the first time you’ve said something to us about it? Do Messiah and Rule know about this?” River fired off a bunch of questions as everyone at the table looked at me with worry.

“I didn’t want to bother them with this. I’m sure it’s nothing more than someone trying to scare me.” I reasoned.

“And that’s all the more reason for you to say something! Rondell has been gone for a while now, and if someone is still harassing you about it, then they could be dangerous or crazy. Either way, it’s not something you should be sweeping under the rug.” River fussed.

“River is right. The fact that they got your address is a red flag in itself, and you don’t live by yourself, but it could put the people you love in danger too. Remember what happened last time? I think you should at least alert the guys and tell them what’s going on. We don’t want to risk anything happening to you or someone else we love.” Triniti stressed.

“I hear y’all. I’ve been holding onto it, because I thought they would eventually calm down, but they won’t stop.” I admitted.

I had tried my hardest to bury those memories to the back of my mind a long time ago. The scars I carried were just as much emotional as they were physical. When Rondell first passed away, I used to sit in my room and cry cause of the guilt inside of me. The blogs and media painted him out to be a saint who may have been overwhelmed with the pressures of life. They made it seem as if he was simply a lost black boy who needed understanding, while I was deemed a hoe and a manipulator. People would tell me I should have been the one he killed or that I didn’t deserve to live, and there were times when I agreed with them.

After the incident, I was forced to pull out of JV and transferred to Douglasville University, where I got my degree in business administration and management. I didn’t bother trying to make friends because I assumed everyone on campus knew my story and would probably judge me for it. Solomon and Messiah often showed up on campus to ensure my safety, and they paid for an apartment in a heavily guarded, expensive neighborhood. There were cameras everywhere, and even though I told them they were unnecessary, everyone disagreed. Those were some of the darkest days of my life, and the recent incidents only stirred up the emotions I desperately wanted to forget.

“When are you gonna tell them?” Triniti pressed.

“I-I’m gonna tell them. Rule and Messiah both have busy schedules, and I don’t want to⁠—”

“Yeah, you can save the bullshit. I just sent a message to Freedom and Oh’Shun and told them to pull up on us. You may not want to tell your brothers, but someone in the family needs to know what’s going on. I keep my mace and a blade on me, but that’s not enough.” Triniti informed me.

“Oh, come on. You didn’t need to involve them. I promise I’m fine.” I assured them.

“Yeah, I could tell by the way you hesitated; you were gonna drag your feet. You must have forgotten that we know you better than anyone else. You love to keep secrets and shit. It’s the reason we didn’t know about Rondell beating on you until he was roasting in hell like a rotisserie chicken.” River added.

“Sis, you didn’t have to add the last part, although you told nothing but the truth. We love you, Nes, but you’ve proved a long time ago that you keep secrets better than the Secret Service.” Triniti called out while I sat there stunned. My family swore up and down that I was sneaky, but I didn’t understand how I was different than everyone else.

“What’s up, family.” Our cousin, Freedom, greeted the table before he took a seat next to River.

“What’s good, Fam? Damn, this place looks nice as hell.” Our other cousin, Oh’Shun, exclaimed as he looked around the restaurant before he took a seat next to me.

“Hey, y’all.” I greeted them.

“Damn, were the two of you down the street or something?” Triniti snickered.

“Actually, we were at the liquor store down the street. We were headed to a party tonight, and we wanted to pre-game.” Oh’Shun answered.