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“Don’t I always take the highway when I drive you home?” I replied sarcastically.

“You know what I mean. I don’t know what your problem is, but if you’re mad, you should at least have the balls to tell me instead of being childish.” She huffed, texting away on her phone.

“I’m childish for taking you home?”

“Solomon, please don’t try to patronize me like I’m stupid. You barely like to spend time away from me, but now all of a sudden you’re taking me home.” She made air quotes with her fingers when she said “home” and it made me feel like shit. Regardless of my feelings, she made a valid point.

I took the exit to get off the highway and pulled into a nearby diner. I put the car in park and sat there, lost in thought. Communication wasn’t something I excelled at, but Honesty was the complete opposite. She hated silence and always wanted to talk things out. She and her brother Messiah had that in common, and he often talked about how stubborn my sister and I were.

People didn’t understand us. They didn’t understand that was how we grew up. Our thoughts and opinions never mattered. Hell, no one ever cared enough to ask how we felt; they just did whatever they wanted and forced us to accept the outcome. I usually internalized my feelings until I was able to sweep things under the rug and move on. It may not have been the healthiest way to deal with things, but it was what I knew.

“Are you going to talk to me about what’s bothering you? We were fine at the studio, and then you flipped out of nowhere. I know the situation with your sister is stressful, but I want to know why you’re mad at me.”

I shifted my body and looked into her pretty brown eyes. She was my blessing and my kryptonite all in one. I had been a hard shell my whole life, but her aura softened me to my core.

“I can’t even really explain it. When you were talking to her, I guess I felt like you were on her side, and I didn’t like that shit. Malea needs tough love, not coddling.” I replied.

“And you think I was trying to coddle her?”

I shrugged instead of answering her audibly.

“Did it ever occur to you that I might identify Malea more than you think?”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Don’t you remember what I was going through around her age? I fell in love with a boy who beat my ass, and I hid it from my family for years. Being a teenager comes with so many different emotions and hormones. You start to think you’re grown enough to make your own decisions when, in reality, you don’t have a clue what life even means.

“As angry and disappointed as you may feel right now, the last thing you want to do is make her feel isolated from her family. Even if you feel like she’s making the wrong decision, she needs to know she can call on you if and when things go bad.

“I know you don’t like it and you have every right to have your concerns, but you don’t want her to pull away from you. He’s already in her head, and if he makes her feel like he’s the only one who cares about her, then she’ll feel helpless if something does happen. Trust me, I had my family around, and I still couldn’t tell them the truth. The last thing you want is for her to feel like she has no one in her corner, because it’ll only make her stay longer.”

I sat there for a moment and pondered what she said and realized she was right. Honesty had a great relationship with her family, and it still didn’t stop her from hiding her pain from them. The last thing I wanted was for Malea to shut down or think she has to put up with a man’s bullshit when she had a family who would do anything for her.

In that moment, I realized how important it was to make sure I didn’t fuck things up with my anger.

“Damn, I didn’t even think about it like that. As mad as I am, I would be even more fucked up if she got into a situation and felt like she couldn’t call on me. I’m sorry for the way I acted. I guess I was being childish because I’m used to you being on my side, and it felt like you were going against me.” I admitted.

Honesty smirked, reaching over to grab my hand.

“Oh, trust me, I know. You and I are twins when it comes to that. I used to get so upset when you and my brothers ganged up on me. I wanted to bash your face in every time, even though y’all were right.”

The sound of her giggling did something to me, and I couldn’t help but stare at her.

“You were bad as hell. They don’t even know half of the shit you were doing back then. I should have snitched on you back then.” I teased, bringing her hand up to kiss it.

“How the hell were you gonna snitch on me when you were right there with me most of the time?”

“Naw, you and your sneaky-ass cousin’s used to always be in some bullshit, and Oh’shun, Freedom, and I used to have to come to your rescue so the family wouldn’t find out. Remember when you and River almost got kidnapped by those Italian niggas? You had no reason getting on that damn plane with some mothafuckin strangers in the first place, then called us crying because they wouldn’t take you back home. You’re the reason a niggas’ hands aren’t clean now.”

She gulped at the mention of her disastrous trip from hell. River thought she had hooked up with a couple of rich tricks, but it turned out to be something more sinister. Her cousin Freedom and I caught a flight, then had to drive to Atlanta and hop on a private courtesy flight with his college friends. It was the scariest shit I had ever been through because I wasn’t sure if we would get to them in time. I caught my first body behind Honesty, and I didn’t regret a single thing.

“I’ve buried those memories so far back in my mind, but the one thing I’ll never forget is the way you came to rescue me. Honestly, I think that’s why I’ve never truly been afraid of anything. No matter what mistakes I’ve made in the past, you were always there for me. I was blessed to have the kind of brothers I have, but you were always my extra secret weapon.” She giggled.

“I love your sneaky ass. Always have, and I always will. You’ll never have to worry about me coming through for you. I’ma be there with mothafuckin bells on or a tool on my hip. Either way, I’m never playin’ about mine.”

FOURTEEN

honesty graham