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From the way he cleared his throat, Rhodes must’ve seen the interaction.

“Theo, Wyatt,” he began quietly, gesturing to her. “This is Sariah, my best friend. Sariah, these are Jude’s best friends: Theo and Wyatt.”

“It’s nice to meet you both,” she said. “Though, I do wish it were under different circumstances.”

Wyatt and I both muttered something, echoing the same sentiment. Under any other circumstances, our greeting would’ve been far more enthusiastic. Her attention on us was fleeting as she turned to Jude. Without so much as asking, she closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around his middle. The two of them looked a little ridiculous together, considering she was just over five feet and Jude was six-foot-four. But Jude didn’t seem to notice the difference. He stooped over and folded his arms around her immediately.

Their familiarity served as a gentle reminder that Jude and Sariah knew each other because, for most of Jude’s life, Sariah had been Rhodes’ girlfriend. Or at least, that was the story everyone had been given. Watching them now, it was strange to think about how much of Rhodes’ life had been hidden behind that lie. Jude had grown up knowing Sariah without ever understanding what she actually was to him—his best friend, his chosen family, the person Rhodes trusted with every part of his life. I’d known it, but to see it in something as simple as the bond Sariah and Jude had, just from random meetings in the last eighteen years.

“I have so many questions for you,” Jude said when she pulled away.

“I’m a lesbian,” Sariah retorted, not missing a beat. The nonchalant response made Jude laugh and Rhodes sigh.

“You’re not helping,” Rhodes told her.

“Actually, that’s incredibly helpful,” Jude countered. “And it explains so much.”

“It explains nothing.”

“She’s your cover, he’s your cover, what’s not to understand?”

“Your problem-solving skills are so much better than you let on,” Rhodes muttered.

I couldn’t help but laugh as their conversation continued. It felt good—better than it probably should have—to hear them fall into their back-and-forth so easily. Jude sounded like Jude again. Rhodes sounded like his big brother again. Even Sariah seemed to fit comfortably into their rhythm.

“You know,” Wyatt began from next to me, “it’s nice to know he’ll have Rhodes to get him through this.”

“Yeah, they’re going to be okay,” I agreed softly.

At least, I hoped they would be. Nothing about today would be easy. Nothing about the days after would be either. They were hurting, and they would be for a while. But they had each other, and I had to think that would be enough.

CHAPTER 76

Rhodes

Icould only avoid going into the church for so long. I knew that. Still, I stayed outside with Jude, Theo, Wyatt, and Sariah until there was almost no one left in the parking lot. I found excuses to linger that barely qualified as excuses—anything that kept me away from the church doors.

Because outside, Mom was still just gone.

But inside? Inside, I had to say goodbye.

The distinction felt stupidly ridiculous, but my mind still clung to it anyway.

The church bells sounded somewhere above us, low and heavy, and my stomach dropped. I looked toward the entrance. The doors stood open, and people disappeared through them in dark clothes and quiet clusters. Every person who walked inside made the inevitable feel a little closer.

Beside me, Jude seemed just as determined to avoid going inside. He found new conversation topics to bring up with Sariah to fill the time, but each question or thought led to another one he was far too content to explore instead of moving toward the door. But even that tapered off as she casually guided him, little by little, back to me, and then left him and me standing alone in silence.

“We have to go in, don’t we?” Jude whispered.

“Yeah, unfortunately.” I sighed and shoved my hands into my pockets. For a few seconds, neither of us moved—or maybe he couldn’t move any more than I could. When his shoulder bumped into mine, I glanced at him. The solemn expression on his face broke my heart because I understood the words he wasn’t saying. We had to. I pulled one hand from my pocket and gripped his shoulder tightly. “Come on. We can do this.”

Together.

Sariah, Theo, and Wyatt had already started toward the entrance, giving us enough space to make the decision ourselves without leaving us behind. I appreciated that more than I could put into words.

The walk across the parking lot felt far longer than it was. The closer we got, the quieter everything seemed to become, and my chest tightened painfully.

One foot in front of the other.