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Before I can go on the hunt for Blue Eyes, my phone pings in my hand.

Sky:

Don’t miss me too much tonight!

Can’t wait to be done with finals. I’m ready to never have to look at a textbook again.

I’m nowhere near drunk enough.

Apparently Izzie was cheating on me all year?

WHAT?

Just found out. So … happy holidays?!

My best friend since middle school is the lucky recipient of a blurry selfie. One where I’m biting down on another dick cookie, with the balls still clearly visible at the base.

Can’t you come and save me from this clusterfuck?

First off … I hope she steps in dog shit daily for the rest of her life, that a terrible bleach job fries her hair so bad it falls out, and that her pillow is hot on both sides every night.

And I’m sorry, baby boy. You know I would be there to help you drown your sorrows in a heartbeat, but I gotta stay up late cramming for tomorrow.

I’m not even upset, just pissed off at myself. Why did I waste so much time on her?

Now I’m out here trying to get laid, and I’m in a stupid festive fucking costume and everything.

Of course you are. Brad Rhodes would never violate a party dress code.

Points for looking cute! Who would’ve thought an ugly Christmas sweater could look good on a cowboy?

I look ridiculous.

But green brings out the forest tones in your eyes …

Whatever. Pinky promise you’re gonna get wasted with me at that stupid fancy Yule Ball.

Right now, I need an entire bowl of party punch and a cute guy’s balls in my mouth to solve all my problems.

“Oh my god, you’re taking forever, Rhodes.” A girl’s voice interrupts me before my best friend’s reply rolls in. Blinking at her, I realize she was part of the group who wanted to play beer pong. Shit. Forgot about her.

“Did you miss me?” I flash a grin and wiggle the last piece of cookie before chomping down on the last bite. Yeah, I’m definitely not gonna pump the brakes where my search for a hot guy and his package are concerned.

She gives me a coy little look in return and reaches out to lift the stack of cups from my hold. “I think more than one of us was missing your pretty face.” Her thick lashes flutter, accentuating the glitter coating her cheekbones and eyelids. With a little swish of her head to one side, the Santa hat she’s wearing bobs.

I know that look.

I’m in the mood for that look.

Reaching forward, I tug gently on the white tuft on the end of her hat. “More than one of you, huh?”

She runs her tongue over bright red lipstick and nods. “My friend thinks you’re hot.”

“And what do you think?” I’m still holding onto the end of her hat, and I roll the furry bobble beneath my fingertips.

Her cheeks flush a little as her lips twist. “I’d say if anyone can look as sexy as you while wearing a Christmas sweater … then I’m extremely invested in seeing what they look like without it.”

I let my eyes drop down her body appreciatively, taking in the sight of a bright crimson corset and matching frilly skirt. She kinda looks like a figure skater who booked a taxi straight from the North Pole.