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Chapter Four

It’s a cloudy Sunday afternoon in Zandvoort, with gusts coming in off the North Sea. Of course, there’s always a chance for a downpour here, but usually they’re brief. It’s cooler today, so I have on my black Collings Motors jacket, and I relished my hot cup of tea this morning in the paddock. Now I’m standing in the back of Caleb’s garage with Isla, and we’re closing in on the start time of the Dutch Grand Prix.

I glance over at the TV monitors on the wall, the familiar feeling of race-day excitement continuing to build in the pit of my stomach. The Downforce Network announcers are reviewing the track and discussing its unique features. Zandvoort has fast corners, fourteen turns, and some steep banking.

Next, the announcers list the cars on the starting grid, starting with the back row and working up to the top positions. Xavier qualified for pole, with Caleb following in second and Mason in third.

My excited feeling mixes with nerves now. It’s going to be a fight right at the start. There’s room on turn one of this circuit to make a move. And they’re all going to attack, because this is a difficult track to overtake on, so the start is critical here.

And Mason and Caleb will be fighting each other.

The Downforce Network shows Xavier in his car, adjusting his blue gloves. The next shot is of Caleb, who already has his visor down.

And then they show Mason in his car.

The camera focuses on his dark brown eyes. He reaches up with one silver-gloved hand and lowers his visor, as if he’s ready for combat now.

What is it about that move that is so hot? The intensity of his eyes, fringed by long, dark lashes? Knowing that as soon as that visor is down, he’s close to embarking on a thrilling yet dangerous drive?

It’s both. Definitely both.

The green lights illuminate on the gantry for the formation lap. As Xavier leads the cars out on the track to warm up, my mind flicks back to my conversation with Mason in his driver’s room on Friday, when he asked me to meet him in Monaco so I can shoot his wardrobe.

In his home.

It is a brilliant idea for content and a great way to launch my channel.

A horrible idea for my unrequited crush on him.

But there was only one answer to Mason’s generous offer. I said yes.

We’re going to meet on Tuesday. Since we’ve made this plan, Mason’s been his normal self with me—bantering and cheerful. I act the same on the outside, but inside, I wonder what mess I’ve gotten myself into.

As Xavier continues to lead the cars around the circuit, the drivers weaving back and forth behind him to warm up the tyres, I remind myself that Mason will only be working with me on two projects. I’m waiting to hear back from some boutiques in London and Monaco about letting us come in to try on some clothing. If I get that arranged, it will be my first “Dress the Driver” feature.

So no big deal. Spending time in his wardrobe, watching him try on clothing, will not fan the flames of my stupid crush at all. If I didn’t have a pulse or eyes, that is.

I need to get through these two projects, and then I can try to hide from him as much as possible.

I cringe as soon as the thought enters my head. I can’t believe for the second time, I’m entertaining hiding from Mason as a solution to my crush.

Maybe I need to reframe it. Like I’m doing selective restrictive interaction with him in order to get over my crush.

Okay, that sounds so much better. I’m going with that.

Xavier approaches the start line, pulling his car up to his grid box. Caleb follows, then Mason.

My excitement builds as the cars all file into position. The medical vehicle pulls up behind the last cars on the track. The medical car always follows on the first lap because it’s the most dangerous time on the track, and it’s always a sobering reminder to me of how dangerous this brilliant sport is.

A race marshal walks behind the last cars on the grid and waves the green flag, signalling that everything is good for the race to start. When he’s halfway through his walk, the red lights begin to illuminate on the gantry.

One light.

The second red light comes on.

I feel my heart rate accelerate as the lights continue to illuminate in sequence until the last red light turns on.

I put my fingertips to my lips, my pulse quickening.