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His smile faded. “I had a pretty good idea.”

“So you left before I could.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. That was answer enough.

I loved him. God, I loved him. That was why I couldn't let him do this.

“Clay.”

“I know.”

“No, you don’t.”

His eyes met mine.

I softened my voice.

“You're my best friend.”

His jaw tightened. “That’s not exactly what every guy dreams of hearing.”

“I know. But maybe you need to hear it.”

“You ever think maybe you could stop deciding for both of us?”

“I’m not deciding for you.”

“Feels like it.”

“I’m deciding for me.” That landed.

He looked away.

I hated hurting him. I hated more that there was no way around it.

“I wish it was different,” I said.

That brought his eyes back.

“But you’re my brother. I love you so much—you are my family—and I’ll never see you any other way.”

Something vulnerable crossed his face. Then disappeared behind his easy smile.

“Yeah, well. I’m extremely persuasive.”

I sighed. “Clayton.”

“I heard you.” This time he meant it. “There’s Micah. I’ll walk you to his car.”

I nodded. He bumped my shoulder lightly with his.

Then he asked, “You really ran six miles before school?”

I looked at him.

“How do you know that?”

“Chief.”