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“But you’re single,” she finishes, her grin turning into a smile.

Ozzie sighs. “Don’t be mean. He’s only single because people have bad taste.”

“Exactly,” I tell them both with a sniff.

“You can third wheel us,” West says. “It’ll be fun. Plus, they have this banana-flavored cold foam coffee I want to try.”

Ozzie shudders again. “Have fun drinking your foamy bananas and being eaten by gigantic space hamsters.”

“I have no idea what that means,” I tell him, “but I promise to never drag you out to see giant rodents.”

Ozzie actually looks relieved, like we were literally considering a station coup to drag him against his will. He rubs the back of his neck, looking a bit sheepish. “Swimming?”

“I’m in.”

West pulls a face again. “I’ll watch until Henry’s off work. Then I’m out.”

Sometimes I like to pretend I’m a champion swimmer who can do fancy styles like the butterfly and the breaststroke. Sometimes I pretend I’m a mermaid with a long, pretty tail, flapping around the water.

Today is more of a mermaid day. The truth is, I can’t seem to get out of my head, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Rune at the station and the way he kind of…leaned into me.

And how good it felt.

And how I pictured him while I was touching myself and then came all over the shower wall. That was kind of a big one.

It shone a beacon on all the questions I’ve been asking myself for a while now. It’s been a few years since I really started to wonder about myself. Especially during training when we’d all strip down to shower after a long day of drills, and there would be all those abs and nipples and hair…

But it never really went anywhere, and I figured all guys did it.

Until several of my straight coworkers told me they didn’t.

It was easy to let go though. I still liked women, and I dated them, and it was fine. And then Rune showed his pretty face, and, well…

“Are you slipping into a coma or something?” Ozzie asks. He’s on a kickboard, making his way from the other side of the pool.

I sink my feet down and bounce a little. “No. Just…thinking. You’re not straight, right?”

Ozzie’s cheeks bloom bright red. “Uh. No.”

I look over at West, who’s admiring her very sparkly toenails under the water. “You?”

She looks up at me. “What?”

“Straight?”

“Gross, no,” she says, wrinkling her nose. “I had a crush on Henry for literally ever, but I only dated girls until him.”

“Cool.”

Ozzie swims closer and then shoves the kickboard under his stomach so he can float better. “You’re not getting weird and homophobic, are you?”

West narrows her eyes. “Bro. I will beat your ass.”

I duck my head under the water for a second, then shake the drops out of my hair before I find the courage to confess the truth. I haven’t even told North about this, but it’s eating me alive.

“I, um…” I take a breath, and I can feel the weight of their gazes on me. “So, the thing is…I think I might…like a guy.”

“Oh,” West breathes out.