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When is he going to take it?
What if it’s tonight?
If it is, what will I be like?
Before the other night, I would have sworn I’d be terrified of him taking me. No, scratch that. It wasn’t from the other night. Honestly, it was the first kiss.
The very first one he gave me on the night he took me. He had me curious starting then.
The fear of him taking me is no longer the worry. The worry is that I’ll want him to, and I’m not supposed to have those feelings for him.
I don’t know where we are in the grand scheme of things. I’ve concluded he’s not going to kill me. At least not yet. But I’m not sure about anything else. Or rather, his intentions to continue keeping his end of the contract. I can’t drop my guard for a man who might hurt my mother.
We reach the landing and head to the bedroom, then right into the bathroom. The scent of citronella greets us. The maids always top up the fragrance before they leave for the day, so it has time to settle. We walk over to the wall where the scent is strongest. Only then does Lev release me, but I know the moment of freedom is a false sense of security.
He’s only loosening the leash, giving me a moment to breathe before he traps me again.
Chapter
Eighteen
Allegra
Itake advantage of the moment of reprieve and catch that breath. Though, foolishly, I rest against the wall, as if it can save me, or at the very least steady my racing thoughts.
Lev keeps his eyes on me as he shrugs out of his leather jacket.
A spark of arousal stirs in my gut when he drags off his T-shirt, exposing his tattooed torso.
I try to ignore the pull coiling through me, but the mere acknowledgment makes it so much worse.
He tosses the shirt into the corner and unbuckles his pants, then he walks up to me and places his hands on the wall, on either side of my head.
That masculine scent of sandalwood, musk, and power overwhelms the citronella. Then all there is, is him.
Lev holds my gaze, his eyes piercing mine. It feels like he’s trying to see inside my head again. “This would be so much easier if you dropped the act.”
I frown, staring back at him with narrowed eyes. “What act?”
“That you hate me.”
“I do hate you.” Even as I say the words, I feel the undercutting lie.
He smirks. “Malyshka, if you hated me, I’d be dead already. The gun was loaded.”
“Maybe I’m just a good person.”
“True hate overpowers even the best people. So, it’s not that. You don’t hate me at all. You wish you did.”
I swallow hard. “You sound so sure about me.”
“I am.”
“How?”
“You want to have sex with me.”
Heat floods my face, then spreads through me, racing beneath my skin. “What makes you think that?”
