Page 55

The tour was a bit overwhelming. I met editors, publicists, and marketing and graphic design people. It was going to be a brain puzzle to remember everyone’s names and roles at the company. I’d never been great with names.

We finally landed at a desk in an empty cubicle that was centrally located in a sea of others.

“This is yours,” Liz said. “Feel free to decorate, bring personal photos in. We love seeing bits and pieces of everyone’s life outside of the office.”

Lady, if you could see my personal life right now, you’d probably fire me on the spot.

“Do you have a dog?” she asked.

“I don’t, sadly.” I shook my head.

“That’s too bad. I was gonna remind you that our staff is welcome to bring their dogs to work, but most don’t take advantage of it every day, just occasionally.”

“Well, should I ever be lucky enough to get a dog, I will keep that in mind.” I smiled.

That idea had been sounding better and better lately. I could certainly use the distraction and made a mental note to talk to Calder about it.

“Well, I’ll let you get acclimated for a bit. There’s a document on your keyboard that will tell you how to get set up in our company database. Take some time to get used to the interface. I’ll come back in about a half hour to discuss your first project.”

“Excellent.” I cleared my throat. “Thank you so much, Liz.”

Once she left me alone at my desk, I felt like I could breathe a little. Just a little. But it only took a few minutes for thoughts of Rafe to enter my mind again. I hadn’t run into him since our tense omakase dinner last week, but that hadn’t stopped me from thinking about him. It seemed I had to be fully occupied in order to forget at all.

Now I wondered about this new person he was hooking up with. Were things over with Cara? I could only imagine how fabulous this woman must be if he’d chosen her over the great Cara Champion. Although, he and Cara hadn’t been exclusive, so maybe he was dating both of them. I shook my head. None of your fucking business, Talia. Just like it was none of your business to stay and watch him jerk off in the shower. I cringed.

I sat up straighter and reached for the document Liz had left me. Following the instructions, I got my computer set up. I felt more connected once I was finished, but my desk looked naked compared to everyone else’s. I vowed to bring in a photo of Calder and me tomorrow to show them I had a life. Though what a life it is, I immediately taunted myself.

When Liz came back by, she began to explain my first assignment.

“We’re gonna start by having you read one of our manuscripts. It’s already been copy edited, but as a final step before proofing, I’d like you to read through it over the next couple of days to flag anything that could be problematic. Our main concern is that we don’t want the heroine to seem unlikeable. You’ll see when reading that some of her decisions leave a lot to be desired in the morality department. But that’s also part of the draw of the story.”

“Okay, great.” I moved some of my hair behind my ear. “Can’t wait to dive in.”

“Wonderful. Just use track changes and comments to indicate any suggestions or red flags. I’ll come get you at three so you can sit in on the afternoon meeting.”

I nodded. “Got it.”

As Liz went back to her office, I opened the file and got started on the manuscript she’d emailed me.

And then the universe laughed. It didn’t take me long to realize why Liz felt this heroine was nefarious: she was basically me. The story was a love triangle where the heroine, Alanna, falls for her husband’s friend, Lucas. While the specifics of the story didn’t mirror my situation, it was too close to home for my comfort. The heroine in this book actually cheated, though the writer tried to demonstrate that she had good reason to stray. Her husband had a difficult personality. And Lucas, incidentally, was also married, which made the story even more complicated.

But the bottom line? The men were friends, which means that regardless of the specifics of the situation, it was wrong. Very wrong. Hear that, Talia?

In my opinion, the author would have to rewrite the entire thing to show the heroine in a good light. I tried my best not to overdo my critique, but I did suggest the author add some internal thoughts to show Alanna with a bit more regret over her actions. However, I realized that having the heroine change any of her choices would mean changing the story itself, which would be a mistake. After all, if the love story were perfect, it wouldn’t be an accurate representation of life. And anything should fly in fiction, I reminded myself. Do we take the murder out of murder mysteries because murder is wrong? No, but…

I started to sweat and had to close the manuscript for a bit.

Thankfully, not long after that, it was time for the afternoon editorial meeting, which helped break up the day and provided some much-needed relief from the fog I found myself in after reading the first half of that fucked-up story. I listened and nodded through most of the meeting, though I had no idea what they were talking about the majority of the time. It will make sense eventually, I assured myself.

At the moment, though, I felt like an imposter. Sort of the same way I felt every moment at home with my boyfriend.

***

That evening on my commute to the brownstone, Calder called to let me know he’d be working late. I hid the disappointment I felt. I’d hoped he’d be there when I arrived so I could unload my day on him.

When I got home, I went upstairs, passing Rafe’s open apartment door and forcing myself not to look in. My plan was also to keep moving, but then his voice stopped me.

“Talia?”