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That got my attention. “What did Kendrick say?” There was no keeping the note of hurt out of my voice.

“He said you weren’t ready. That you needed time to figure out who you are again. That although you were extremely good at blocking any attempts to read your thoughts, little snippets bled through now and again. Enough to give away your true mental state.”

“I know who I am.”

“Do you?” Cade’s gaze was sharp enough that I looked away first. “Because if this is who you are, then—”

“Then what?” It suddenly became all too clear where this was heading. “You’re firing me. Is that it?”

“Cade…” The warning in Asher’s voice was completely inappropriate for a PA to his boss, but then Asher was no normal PA. He had enough money to walk away and never work another day in his life. Yet, he’d chosen to stay because he was good at what he did and Cade needed him.

Indecision flickered across Cade’s face. Time slowed. “No,” he said at last.

Relief hit me harder than expected. If you’d asked me this morning whether I loved my job, I’d have said no. But it gave me purpose. A reason to get up in the morning. People to see. And, of course, it paid the bills. More than paid the bills, if I were honest. Cade had paid me a considerable amount for doing very little.

“But you are suspended.”

The relief collapsed in on itself. “What? How long for?”

“Three months. Then we’ll meet and reassess whether you’re ready to come back.”

“Three months!” I’d turned into a parrot. “What am I meant to… I don’t know what…”

Cade’s expression softened. “Do whatever you need to do. I suggest facing your demons instead of drowning them in alcohol and sex. That didn’t work for Griffin, the alcohol part anyway, and it won’t work for you.”

“I’m fine.” Each time I said it, it rang hollower.

“Half pay,” Cade added, “for those three months. Perhaps you’ll decide once they’ve ended that you don’t want to come back, that this isn’t the place for you.”

After that, everything blurred. The next thing I knew, I was in Asher’s office instead of Cade’s. He leaned against the desk, arms crossed. He only needed a yacht in the background, and it could have been an aftershave commercial. John would probably have called it Frostborne or Subzero.

“Cade was more than fair,” Asher pointed out carefully. “No one would’ve argued with him firing you for the stunt you pulled.”

“Yeah.” What else could I say?

“And three months isn’t that long.”

“No.”

He pulled out his car keys. “Come home with me. Talk it through with Calisto. The two of you can put the world to rights. Maybe move back in for a while. We’d have to set some ground rules, but—”

I backed off, shaking my head. “I need to go.”

“Baxter…”

I’d already turned my back on him. “Tell Calisto I’m fine and not to worry.”

“I really think you—”

The lift doors slid shut, cutting him off mid-sentence.

For once, the lift gods were on my side.