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Chapter 32

The dizziness came on without warning. Her legs wobbled, suddenly too weak to hold her weight.

Fae dropped to her knees, one hand braced against the packed earth, her breath coming in panicked bursts. The unease she'd been carrying in her chest for days—the restlessness, the constant pacing of her wolf beneath her skin—clicked into place with brutal clarity.

He had been getting closer and closer, like a hunter stalking prey. It was her delusion that he would give her this time to herself—he was too selfish to let her go, as she had not outlived her usefulness.

Her Goddess-given lifemate.

Her wolf prowled and threw herself at the barrier, trying to force a shift, starved and raw, reaching for a touch she had been denied for too long. And she knew, with a terror that refused to loosen its grip, that he must be feeling it, too.

The hunger that did not bend to reason.

The pull after this unnatural separation.

And now she was afraid.

Afraid to move.

Afraid to greet him because she did not trust herself. She had told herself when she had made up her mind to leave that she would be able to withstand the power of this bond which had shrivelled, starved as it was from the barest of care from him.

A now familiar presence blocked out the sun, and Kenji materialised in front of her, already crouching in front of her as if he'd guessed the turmoil in her mind.

"I am with you in this," he said quietly. "And in all things, my friend. Let me come with you."

Fae could not meet his eyes. The visible sliver of shining velvet gold of her eyes beneath lowered lids were too exposed—all her confusion and fear there for the world to see.

"I am afraid," she whispered, both hands folded over her chest. "I am afraid I will see him and just give up the fight…go with him." Her fingers curled into the earth. "I am afraid he will offer me crumbs, and I will follow him back. My wolf…my wolf has been pushing me to go back. What if I can't stop myself? What if I am not strong enough to resist once I see him?"

Kenji cupped her face gently, forcing her gaze to his.

"Look at me… Fae, look at me," he said, voice steady, unyielding. "You are the bravest she-wolf I have ever met. You saved my life, and it is yours to command, whether you want it or not. Lean on me if you must. You don't always have to face everything alone "

She searched his face, doubt flickering like a wounded wildling, afraid to trust.

He saw it and couldn't help but reflect the pain back.

"With no expectations," he added softly. "I betrayed your trust when you thought you could depend on me. Let me repent. Let me be your shield."

Fae blinked, breath choking, as after a long moment, she slowly nodded and let her tense body sag a little.

Then another presence slid into her vision.

Aiko crouched beside her, worry etched deep into her perfect little face. She reached out without hesitation, pressing her forehead to Fae's shoulder.

"I come with you, my Fae," she said gently. "Do not be afraid."

And Fae didn't feel quite so alone anymore. The irony of being afraid of facing her lifemate made her lips twist in a humourless smile .

"Alright, better get this over with," she managed. "But first, I need to get something."

When Fae returned, the sickle was strapped across her back.

The blackened metal caught the sunlight as she walked with renewed purpose, a dark gleam against the pale pink folds of her yukata. That she had armed herself to meet those of her own village spoke louder than any accusation she could have made aloud. She had not once felt the need to lay a hand on the blade since coming here, but today was different.

Aiko's small hand was warm in hers, a solace in the midst of the tempest in her heart. Kenji followed a step behind, silent and watchful. And to her surprise, Fae realised the fear had released its chokehold somewhat. Whatever waited ahead, she would not face it alone.

As the gates came into view, she saw him.