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“I be sorry ’bout it all. We should’ve ’ad the foresight to leave ’fore the storm worsened.”
“’Tain’t your fault. I didn’t wish to leave early, anyway.”
He peered down at his hands as he laced them on the table. “Ye enjoyed yourself this evenin’, then?”
“Very much.” Especially the latter end.
“Was the assembly everythin’ ye ’oped it’d be?”
“Moreso,” she whispered.
He nodded. “I be glad to ’ear it. And…and ye enjoyed the dancin’?”
Livvy could hear the hesitance in his tone. But then, why was it there at all? “Yes, I did. Very much.”
Another nod. He pulled in his lips before he spoke again. “Ye did seem to be enjoyin’ yourself with each dance.”
Livvy paused. He’d been watching her? Now it was her turn to hesitate. But then, why should she when he’d made the slip? “Ye saw me, then?” she asked.
His lips parted, and he dropped his gaze. “Just a time or two.”
As if she could believe that. “Ye must’ve been hidin’ then. I couldn’t find ye all night.”
Again, he looked away. “Yes, as I said, I ’ad a few things to see to. But I do be sorry ’bout it.”
What needed seeing to in the middle of a dance was beyond her. But then, he clearly wished to keep his secrets. Who was she to ask him to share them when he was not ready? Even she had secrets she still held close to her chest.
Images of her mother flashed through her mind, but she set them aside. Now was not the time to dwell on the past. Now was the time to enjoy the present. To enjoy these quiet, intimate moments with August.
“I did ’ear ye were introduced to many men off the Mount,” August said next.
Had he heard that, or had he seen it? “Yes, quite a few.”
His jaw twitched. “And did ye find anyone ye wished to get to know further?”
His tone was tight, even in a whisper, as if he was hesitant to ask. So then, why was he asking? Simply to make conversation?
Or because he wanted to know if she liked anyone beyond him?
She stared up at him, attempting to decipher his feelings from merely staring at his profile as he watched the flames sliding along the large logs in the hearth. His shoulders were high, as if tensed to await her response.
If her dream had come true and August did have feelings for her, he was asking this out of jealousy. But could that ever be true? Could this man she loved truly not wish for her to be with anyone other than himself?
She knew she ought to relieve his suffering, but part of her had to know the truth of the matter. And part of her couldn’t help but relish in the idea that the man she loved could not bear the thought of her being with anyone but himself.
“Yes,” she replied in a whisper. “I did find someone.”
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
“I have so much in me, and the feeling for her absorbs it all; I have so much, and without her it all comes to nothing.”
The Sorrows of Young Werther, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
August’s heart ached. Was it true? Had Livvy met someone that evening whom she wished to see again? Whom she wished to know better? Whom she…whom she could perhaps love one day?
He clenched his teeth, fisting his hands tighter together until the whites appeared in his knuckles. What a fool he’d been. To listen to Mr. May, to introduce those men to Livvy, to not sweep in and catch her before she could be swept up by another man.
As regret gave way to anger for his stupidity, rage burned through his limbs. Why had he not done more? Why had he not made his intentions with her known from the start? And who was this man who’d managed to turn her eye?
