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Adonis had not tasted any cake.

“The wedding is for you,” he said.

That stuck between her ribs. It was true; she was the one who’d wanted a wedding. But for some reason hearing him say that hurt and she had a hard time letting it go. She perseverated on it while they looked at flower arrangements. While she helped choose flowers for the arbor that would go over where they would stand, and while she grew more and more detached from why they were doing this. To the point where it all started to feel unreal.

It was like she was planning a party for herself, not a wedding.

And by the time they arrived at the boutique for her gown, she was wondering what the purpose of it even was.

It had been to fulfill some kind of girlhood fantasy, but the truth was, she wasn’t sure she had ever really been dreaming about the wedding so much as she’d been dreaming about suddenly having normal things for herself.

Because a wedding, falling in love, getting married, having a family, those were things that a lot of people assumed they would have because they assumed they would have the same life that their parents had.

She had never thought that. Had never wanted it. The fantasy of a wedding, of a relationship that would lead to a wedding, was something audacious.

But now it just felt silly.

“Miss Brown,” the woman in the boutique shop greeted her warmly. “I think we’ve met before. My name is Julie Carmichael.”

“Oh yes,” she said. “Julie. We have met.”

She had sourced fashion from her before for events in the past, and she was nice to work with. Though she suddenly felt a little bit more self-conscious about everything given that she was there and pregnant and with Adonis, and it wasn’t like he loved her or anything.

That thought was like a knife’s edge underneath her skin.

He didn’t love her.

It was all good and fine and it didn’t matter. This wedding wasn’t for her. It was for their…their child to look back on.

She tried to imagine that future and all she could see was a void.

It made it feel like a silly charade. It would’ve been easier if it had been a stranger. Or maybe it wouldn’t have been.

Esme couldn’t be certain. Maybe nothing about this was easy. Maybe no part of her life was ever going to be all that easy.

Well, the first hardship you ever had to deal with wasn’t your fault. This one kind of is.

“Obviously I need something that flows away from the body,” she said, indicating her baby bump.

Julie laughed. “Well. You don’t need something that flows away from the body. This isn’t 1950. A pregnant bride isn’t taboo, and you can show that bump off if you want. It’s just more joy added to your special day.”

That would be a beautiful sentiment if the circumstances were different.

She turned and looked at Adonis.

“It’s not his choice,” Julie said.

Esme turned back. “Oh, I know. I do.”

The wedding was for her anyway. She wasn’t doing this for him.

“In fact, you should step outside. Because the groom shouldn’t see the bride before the wedding. And he shouldn’t see the wedding dress.”

He lifted a dark brow.

“Don’t argue with me,” she said.

That earned her an intense scowl, and that at least pleased her.