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“Hey, Baji. You’re calling early?”
“I’m not doing it,” I blurted out, my well-rehearsed speech going out of my head.
“Pardon? What aren’t you doing?”
“I’m not going to tell Mum and Dad about your travel plans. You need to do it. I don’t want to be the family fall guy any longer, the messenger that gets repeatedly shot, the one who has to give everything up for someone else.”
I took a breath, trying to stem my word vomit.
She was silent for a few seconds. “Okay . . . that was intense.”
“Shit,” I said, rubbing my face. “I’m sorry. It was meant to come out a lot more eloquently than that, and with a nice lead-in, but I got too nervous and then it just all kind of came out.”
“I can tell,” she said, amusement in her voice—to my relief. “I think you need to explain it a bit more though.”
I sighed. “Ever since we were little, Mum and Dad have expected me to sacrifice because of my role as the elder sibling. When you got sick, it hit them so hard. All of us, in fact. I was pressured into giving up all my clubs, and I think it kind of trained me to do the same with everyone else, including Drew.”
“Wow,” she said slowly. “They made you give up your clubs?”
“They insinuated that it’d make you worse if I didn’t. Or Mum did, anyway.”
“Bloody hell. I never realized that, Nisa. I remember you always being around, and that you said you didn’t want to do swimming and dancing and all that stuff anymore. But I kind of assumed that it had been your own choice.” She paused. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s not your fault, Aisha. You were just little.”
“Even so. If I hadn’t gotten sick—”
“Nope. Don’t even say that. It wasn’t your fault.”
“Crap . . . and ever since then, you’ve gone on looking out for me and sacrificing for me. And I’ve reinforced that behavior by always asking you to deal with Mum and Dad for me. I hadn’t really thought of it from your side before. Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I guess I didn’t want to rock the boat. Plus, I kind of thought it was all normal, until Kerr pointed some stuff out to me.” My heart glowed brightly just at the thought of Kerr, all dark eyes, serious, handsome face, toned body, kind and protective nature . . .
“Nisa! Are you listening?”
“Sorry, got distracted. What did you say?”
“I said that I think Kerr is good for you. Much better than dickhead Drew.”
I laughed loudly, appreciating for the first time how the sound echoed round the kitchen. “You’re right. He is.”
“You need to get that one locked down. Have you guys said the L-word yet?”
My heart tripped along a little faster. “Not yet, but we’re close. At least, I am. The only reason I’ve not said it yet is because I don’t want to overwhelm him. He’s been through a lot with his relationships in the past, including his family. Plus, I’m freshly separated and I don’t want him to think this is some kind of rebound thing.” I paused. “Not when it’s the real deal.”
Aisha squealed in response. “This is so exciting! You have to tell him soon, Baji. And call me immediately afterward for a blow-by-blow account.”
“I will.”
“And I’ll tell Mum and Dad about traveling.” She paused. “Or maybe I’ll get Seb to do it.”
“Aisha.”
“Fine! I’ll do it.”
The doorbell rang and infused me with the delightful notion that it was Kerr, about to leave for that early-morning job on the farm he told me about. Perhaps he’d come over here first to tell me that he loved me! “Aisha, I need to go. But I’ll call you soon, okay?”
“Love you.”