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He nods, the cutest little spark in his eyes. “Tie you to the radiator. Make you eat Spaghetti-Os out of a bowl on the floor.”
“Yeah? That’s pretty hardcore.”
He blushes, but he doesn’t look away. “Yeah. I’m gonna be the boss sometimes.”
It snags something deep in my chest. I want to wrap him up, keep him safe forever. But I also want to see him try. I want to see what he’s capable of when he believes he’s allowed to want things. I thumb the line of his jaw, then press my forehead to his.
“Remind me to teach you how to tie a proper knot.”
He giggles, and it’s like the sun breaking through storm clouds. “Promise.” He’s still trembling, but his face is open, more alive than I’ve ever seen it.
I want to tell him a thousand things, but what comes out is, “I love you, Kamden. You’re my whole damn life now, and I’m not letting you go. Ever.”
His breath hitches. “You love me too?”
I laugh, and when I let go of his face, I touch the tip of his nose. “So fucking much, baby. Now, sit tight while I get us home.”
He wiggles his bound wrists. “Can you leave these on a little longer?”
“Sweetheart, I could leave them on all day.”
He hums, content, and leans his head back as I pull back onto the road. He gazes at the gray sky, foot tapping quietly to a tune only he can hear. The rest of the drive is quiet, but not tense. He dozes a little, head against the window, sippy cup wedged between his knees. I keep glancing over, making sure he’s still breathing, still here, still mine.
When we finally pull into the driveway of my bungalow, Kamden’s eyes are wide and awake, the old fear flickering at the edges but not taking over.
He waits patiently while I untie his wrists, then flexes his hands and bounces in the seat.
“Ready to see your new room?” I ask, twisting to look at him.
He hesitates for a split second, then nods. “Yeah. I’m ready.”
He practically vibrates with excitement as we get out of the car. He spins a slow circle, taking in the house, then the yard, then the maples that line the street. It’s embarrassingly suburban, the kind of place you’d expect to find a golden retriever and a mailbox shaped like a lighthouse. Never mind the security cameras and the fact that every curtain in every window is blackout thick.
He stands still, face upturned, like he’s trying to soak up the sky. “It’s so… green,” he says, awe softening his voice.
“It’s all the trees,” I tell him. “There are some evergreens in the back too.”
He looks over at me, and I see him fighting a smile, still cautious even now. “There’s a back?”
I chuckle. “It’s small, but yeah, there is.”
“Wow…” he murmurs.
God, he’s too fucking cute.
I reach for the trunk, start pulling out the few boxes we have, and he’s wandered off down the path to a little side yard. It’s shaded and overgrown, dandelions everywhere, and I can see from here that he’s spotted something in the bushes. He freezes, drops to a crouch.
A cat emerges, gray and rough-looking. It watches Kamden with the same mix of curiosity and suspicion that I sometimes see in Kamden’s own eyes.
I walk over, slow so I don’t spook either of them. “Careful,” I say. “The cats out here are all semi-feral. The woman in the house next to us feeds them, so they stick around.”
Kamden nods, staying perfectly still. The cat edges closer, tail flicking, then stops just out of reach. Kamden holds out his hand, palm-up.
“Can I try?” he whispers.
“Sure. You can try.”
He sits cross-legged on the ground and waits. The cat sniffs, makes a low, warning growl, then decides he’s harmless and rubs her head against his knee. He lights up like a switch got flipped inside him. Gently, he strokes her back, fingers trembling just a little. The cat drools on his jeans, purring with enough force to vibrate him.
