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Now I’m adrift, forever alone

(chorus)

Your memory’s slipping through my hands

Much like the endless grains of sand

The ocean whispers a sweet goodbye

Lost in the music of a friend gone by

The joy in the songs we used to play

Is now a ghost always fading away

My world’s now dim, your light once bold

A story unfinished, forever untold

(chorus)

Your memory’s slipping through my hands

Much like the endless grains of sand

The ocean whispers a sweet goodbye

Lost in the music of a friend gone by

In every chord, in every tear,

Your heartbeat is the song I hold so dear

And as the last note starts to fade

I’ll sing our tune, though I’m still afraid

I’ll find your voice on the wind’s cry

In the endless silence, I’ll keep asking why

Now I’m broken, ever more to roam

I’ll carry you with me, till I find home

I wiped away the tears rolling onto the page of my notebook, blurring the pencil that I’d used to write those words. The pain was fresh, like a wound reopening, but the song held another meaning I wasn’t ready to label.

I wasn’t a kid who fell in love every day, and I definitely loved Hardy, but I hadn’t been in love with him.

Each word in that song struck differently as I reread it. They could easily apply to my feelings since losing Hardy, but they were tinged with something new. I just couldn’t figure out why.

Chapter Four

Thatcher

We pulled into the parking lot of our local Ralph’s Fresh Fare on the Pacific Coast Highway and bailed out of the pumper. After I left the beach house at the crack of dawn, I’d gone to Station 2 to meet up with the rest of my crew who weren’t on duty.

Team One, Assistant Captain Moss’s team, were now on the clock and would stay with the trucks in case the tones sounded for an emergency. The members would give the neighborhood kids tours of the equipment while also running a game where kids could shoot water from small hoses at targets to win prizes.