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“Why not?”
“Because I’m tired of being the one who has to prove she’s worth keeping.”
Crim pulled me into a hug.
I didn’t cry. I wouldn’t let myself. But I gripped his jersey, holding on while he stood solid and steady, the way he’d always been.
“Whatever you choose,” he said into my hair, “I’ll support you.”
“Even if I leave?”
“Even then.”
“But?”
“But don’t leave because you’re afraid.”
“I’m not afraid.”
He pulled back, looking down at me with his dark orc eyes that saw too much. “In all the time I’ve known you, you’ve only been scared of three things. Losing the people you love, not being enough, and disappointing me.”
I could barely breathe.
“You could never disappoint me,” he said.
“What if I leave and it’s the wrong choice? What if I stay and it’s worse?”
“Then you’ll learn.” He squeezed my shoulder. “That’s what we all do.”
I wanted to believe that there was a version of this where I made the right choice instead of the safe one.
“You’ve always been enough,” he said.
“Then why doesn’t he see it?”
“Because he’s afraid of the same things you are.”
“That doesn’t make it okay.”
“No.” He ran a hand over his face. “But it makes it understandable. Look, you want me to go beat him up? I will. Gladly. He deserves it. But that won’t fix what’s broken between you two.”
“Maybe nothing can.”
“Maybe.” His voice went quiet. “Or maybe you’re both so scared of wanting something that you’re destroying it before it can fail on its own.”
That landed like a punch.
“Go to Denver,” he said. “See what they’re offering. Then decide what you want. Not what’s safe or what proves something. What you actually want.”
“What if I still can’t figure it out?”
His smile crooked up one side of his mouth. “You will.”
I drove home, unsure about anything, and went inside. Marzipan sat on my bureau, watching me pace around the suitcase I’d laid on the bed.
“Pros of leaving,” I said, ticking them off on my fingers. “New city. Fresh start. Amazing opportunity. Better salary. Big-name athletes. No painful daily reminders.”
She slow-blinked.
