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My shit will never be together! You get your shit together!

“Four…You should’ve been crawling your ass to my place.”

Ha! I’m coming for you now!

“Five. I thought you didn’t get jealous.”

I have a new favorite cookie, Will! I didn’t even know it existed before!

I’d been riding Scooter McGavin for miles, fingers frozen to the handlebars—this infuriatingly blank notebook paper clenched between my teeth—and I was not looking cute. Over my long-johns, I’d rolled Hasan’s basketball shorts, designed for bears, three or four times at the waist so I could maintain optimal scooting form. The BU hoodie I’d stolen was child-sized. I might’ve had a towel on my head still—I’d left quickly. At least I could zip myself away entirely in my long puffy coat when I got there…

But I’d never be rid of this fucking glitter.

Will made me absolutely crazy. I barely even recognize myself at this point.

My phone vibrated in my pocket.

Black Swan: Not sure if you were planning to come to dinner, but Will rescheduled.

Motherfucker!!

Will

My jaw was tight. I felt like I’d been chewing on tin foil for hours.

I’d crashed The Swan Dive after leaving the club on New Year’s, freezing my ass off, and spilled the whole saga to Eilidh. We got rip-roaring drunk, and I woke up at Christian’s without a phone. I’d left mine in the pocket of the coat I’d given to the cold cigarette chick. One smoke in exchange for a brand-new $1000 phone—my sisters were going to kill me.

I’d avoided my house since then, but now the stakes had changed, and I kicked myself for being so unprepared.

I’d shown up at Lou’s to see if we could talk and found the door unlocked. Obviously, I opened it to check on her, and when I did, something slipped to the floor from where it was wedged between the door and frame.

It was a photo of the two of us from New Year’s, taken from a distance. Mother of God, she looked fucking gorgeous. Hair flowing down the perimeter wall, my fingers locked in it on the side of her face. I was kissing her senseless. You could see it in my whole body. Her golden skin was lit up by the fireworks in the night sky behind us, her thigh wrapped up around my hip. It looked like the best kiss of her life. It was undoubtedly the best kiss of mine. And the photo was hot as fuck—definitely going in my deployment spank bank.

I’d worked up an entire hard-on before my brain came online and immediately transitioned to suspicion. Why was it printed on shitty computer paper? Why was it here? I flipped it over, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

Love breaks down walls. <3

Oh fuck no. Did that look like a man’s handwriting? This ends today, Mike.

He was totally fucked. I’d told that shitstain I was watching his ass, and this is an intentional escalation from pathetic to disturbing.

I drove as fast as I could to the dorm. Has would call her—make sure she was okay. And then he’d come with me. I was sure of it—even just to keep me from doing something stupid and winding up in jail. He needed to unleash the bear; he was way more intimidating than me.

I took the stairs like always, teeth gritted. The hallways were deserted with everyone on break, but I knew he’d be here.

I burst into the room with the photo in hand and—all my shit got fucked at once.

Hasan was naked as a jaybird, giving New York pretty Jaimie some kind of sensual massage on my old bed. They both jumped up, dicks out, scrambling.

“What the fuck, Has?” I bellowed, and then, nicer since I didn’t know him very well, “Hey Jaimie, good to see you.”

He waved.

“Will! God, this is embarrassing… I⁠—‘’

Not to belittle him, but this was nothing. I’d seen so many penises in my life, this was just another day, another dick.

"Do you know where Louisa is?”