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“Like, we’re not often…vertical.”
What am I saying? I don’t have the words to describe what Serena and I have become. We’re not dating, not boyfriend and girlfriend, not partners.
“You’re sleeping with her,” Jenna gasps. “Oh, Lord.”
“She’s actually Coen’s soon-to-be sister-in-law. So I knew her personally before that.”
“Wait… What? She’s related to Coen?”
“Yeah, that’s how I met her.”
Jenna tsks lightly. “I’ve never known you to be messy, Jamie.”
“I’m not trying to make a habit of it,” I say. “She might be my exception to the rule.”
“Interesting,” she says.
I wait for her to elaborate, but she doesn’t.
“So what are your plans for her,” I ask.
“You saying that as her agent?” There’s a little spice to that question.
“I’m saying it as someone who cares about her,” I say firmly.
That’s the first time I’ve admitted it out loud. It rings out in the brief stillness. I care. I care about her. She makes everything feel better, like I’m not searching for the next best thing anymore without knowing what it looks like. That’s a peace I never thought I’d get.
“Well, I was planning on bringing her out to the studio, work with her a bit, see if we’re a good fit,” says Jenna.
“Where at?”
“New Haven.”
It’s the agency’s studio outside Nashville, situated at the edge of a lake on a restored farm. I’ve been there once, just on behalf of a client renting the space. It’s a beautiful, placid piece of land.
“Alright,” I say. “Let me give you her number and go ahead and have you call her. She spoke to me about the email this morning, so she’ll be waiting on you or me.”
“You want to call her?”
“No can do, as you said, I’m not her agent.”
We talk for a minute longer, then I hang up. A car rolls by, then another. I’m not thinking hard, just letting myself ruminate on everything.
My chest is lighter than air.
This is my opening. I need to take it.
But I can’t do that today, or tomorrow. Maybe not even next week. Because this is her moment, and I won’t overshadow that. I’m gonna hold off and call Jenna, see where things sit after their visit. Then, once she’s settled, I’m gonna pay Serena a visit and see whether she’s still interested in being more than friends.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
SERENA
I tell everyone I’m going to Mom’s the day I fly to Tennessee. I don’t know why, but I find it incredibly embarrassing to explain to my family that I’ve been writing music and posting it online. At a certain point, I’ll have to because there are only so many times I can pretend to be in New York before Sabrina mentions it to Mom and then my cover is blown.
But right now, I want to do this on my own.
I need to.
