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Oh wait.
It was the smallest shift. A slow, heavy throb deep inside me that traveled up through my hips and down through my knees, into my teeth, into the soles of my feet.
And at that moment, I realized I was feeling his pulse, buried inside me where our bodies had joined.
He held himself so still above me, and yet I could feel him alive in there, steady as a second heartbeat that belonged to both of us.
And the beauty of this moment, this knotting, this synchronized, harmonious pulsing hit me hard.
This big, arrogant, eight-hundred-year-old creature had wanted me so much that his own body lost the argument. He hadn't planned this knot. He hadn't decided on it. The magic in his body just took one look at me, swelled up, and locked on like it was scared I'd get away.
Unlike with other lovers, I didn't have to earn this sort of devotion. I didn't have to cook for it, pray for it, or cast a single spell to make it happen.
Yoichi and his bond just wanted me that damn much. So much that now he couldn’t leave my body just yet.
Fuck. This is powerful.
For a few seconds, I thought about my past lovers. I'd had men roll off me before and reach for their phones. Men who kissed my forehead and started hunting for their drawers in the dark. Men who fucked me and took their hearts right back out the door with them, even while they were still lying in my bed.
But Yoichi couldn't go anywhere, and the craziest part was, he didn't look like he wanted to, even if he could.
He was just holding himself above me, stroking my dreadlocks and gazing down at me like we had all the time in the world.
My whole life, I'd been the one holding everything together.
The spells.
The rituals.
The graves.
Aunt Delphine's expectations sitting on my shoulders like a thorn-riddled crown ready to cut me.
Every root, every prayer, every dead body of a lover washed and buried. Everything had always been on me to handle.
But right now, pinned beneath him—my mate—stuck to him, with nowhere to go and nothing to fix. . .I didn't have to hold anything any damn more.
He was holding me.
And I knew without a doubt that from now on. . .my comfort would be his job. He'd made that clear with every soft kiss and every careful breath.
My lips parted. “Yoichi. . .”
“Shh.” He lowered his forehead to mine. “Breathe with me.”
I was about to ask why until I felt his chest rise against my breasts, and I just. . .obeyed and. . .breathed with him.
Slow.
Deep.
We breathed in together, and then we breathed out.
And with every breath, the knot slowly began to. . .soften.
Okay. . .now I understand.
A pulse.
