Page 51
He lowers his head to my shoulder.
I stroke the warm line of his neck, fingers smoothing over his groomed coat, and let myself breathe properly for the first time tonight.
“I wanted him.”
The shame comes first and builds into anger. It slides under my skin, replaying every second in hot, thrilling fragments.
Then confusion follows.
Because I wanted Fionn to catch me. To fight with me. To want me.
I move to the corner of the stall, put the rug under me, and sink into the shadows. I tuck my knees to my chest and stare at the opposite wall until the grain of the wood blurs.
Fionn is engaged to Eilish.
He had my nipple in his mouth and fingers between my legs.
A laugh slips out of me, small and strained.
“Excellent willpower, Sera,” I whisper. “Really maturing beautifully.”
Fury flicks an ear like he agrees, and I close my eyes.
For a few minutes, there’s only his breathing, the muted rumble of men outside the barn and a dog barking. I’ve slept in this stable countless times before. Tonight won’t be any different.
“Sera,” Ma’s voice startles me. “You got something to tell me?”
The familiar waft of cigarette smoke comes first, and then I see her face beyond the stall bars. Her hair is scraped back, and gold hoops dangle from her lobes.
“Sounds like ya already know.”
“What were ya thinking?”
I shrug. “They won’t risk hurting me when Keira’s playing housewife with Saint. Eilish made me promise to stick by her, and I thought I could suss them out in their own territory. Men let things slip when they’re comfortable and have had too much booze.”
She cocks a brow. “So, what did ya learn?”
“Alasdairs a vain old bastard, and his son, he’s…” I trail off.
“Dangerous.” Ma finishes for me.
“Yeah,” I agree. “I won’t go back there, Ma. I promise.”
Ma takes a drag of her cigarette and blows the smoke into the stall. “Forget about Eilish. She’s dead to ya now.”
I shake my head, get to my feet and move to the bars. “I said I won’t go back to the Harrington estate. That doesn’t mean I’ll forget about Eilish.”
“What will ya do when she moves in with him? When that very place becomes her home.”
Fuck, I hadn’t thought about that.
“Alasdair controls everything and everyone around him,” Ma points out. “He’ll keep Eilish under his thumb and squeeze ya out of her life eventually.”
“She won’t let that happen.”
“She won’t have a choice, Sera.”
Ma turns and walks away while my heart thumps faster in my chest.
