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Everything I did and said to her that night… It’s all so much fucking worse now. The way I forced her into the basement. The way I threatened her. Accusing her of working with her father, forcing her to tell us all about her trauma without even giving her the courtesy of believing her.
Why? Gods… why?
Each sin I’ve committed against my Fated Mate stacks on top of the last, building a mountain made from my fuck ups. My stomach swoops. Bile surges, and I spin on my heel, sprinting to the edge of the forest.
I make it three feet in before my stomach heaves, expelling its contents as tears stream down my face.
Panting, I swipe a shaking hand over my mouth and fall back against a tree.
I’ve never hated myself more than I do now.
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and try to pull myself together. I swipe at my face and push off the trunk with a groan.
A rustling from above makes me glance up, and I almost fucking scream when I meet the glaring gaze of Vharax.
“Fuck, you’re quiet when you want to be,” I mutter.
I cross the clearing and take my place at Vae’s side. Like he’s been waiting for me to get back from puking, he straightens his spine and puffs out his chest.
“I–we–are going to fight for you,” Vae declares with a confidence I don’t fucking feel. “We’re going to fight, and we’re going to keep fighting. We’re going to earn your forgiveness.”
Idril frowns. “What if I don’t want you to fight for me?”
“We’re going to anyway.”
Like his answer is both expected and a surprise, her face falls. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive you. You may be fighting for nothing.”
“You’re not nothing,” he spits. “You’re the opposite of nothing.”
Her shell cracks.
Idril’s eyes fill with tears that sit precariously along her lower lash line, threatening to spill with every blink. Her lip trembles and she swallows convulsively before trying to speak again.
“So that’s what it’s to be, then. Duty. Obligation.” Her voice is a whisper. Every syllable dripping in pain. Her hand presses against her chest, and her face twists in agony.
“I wasn’t expecting… I really thought—” She dismisses her unfinished thought with a wave of her hand. “It doesn’t matter. Both are equally awful, just in different ways.”
What is she talking about? What’s happening?
“I won’t spend the rest of my life Bonded to two men who hate me,” she chokes on a sob, curling her hands into fists and biting down on her bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. “I can’t stop you from doing whatever you decide to do. We both know it. But I won’t let you force me into the role of captor. I won’t tie myself to either of you, knowing you hated me mere hours ago. Knowing that if it weren’t for my scent, you’d hate me still.”
“No!” I shout in objection. I catch myself before I rush forward, forcing my legs to stay put. “Idril, that’s not true. I know—Fates, I know you won’t believe us, but I swear to you…”
“Please don’t,” she whispers, swiping angrily at a tear trickling down her cheek.
“I won’t lie to you. Yes, the Bond changes things a little. But I swear on my Pack… I haven’t hated you since the moment Caelan set the record straight and—”
Her face pales, and I curse, replaying my words in my head. But before I can explain, her eyes flare bright with anger.
“Why don’t I make this easy on all of us.” She plants her hands on her hips, and even at five-foot-nothing, the look on her face makes me feel two feet tall.
A wave of dread washes over me as her words register, each one dripping in finality.
“My answer is no.”
Vae flinches like he’s been slapped. “I don’t… I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?” She snaps as Soren lifts his hand and wraps his tattooed fingers gently but securely around her delicate neck.
