Page 27

My chest squeezed until breathing turned painful once more. She probably never wanted to speak to me again—which, fair—except the growl bubbling under my ribs disagreed.

You don’t get to decide that on your own, Mia.

The sun glinted off the surface of the lake, and I blinked as I spied a familiar silhouette wandering aimlessly.

She looked as if she’d dredged herself from underwater: head bowed, shoulders slumped, leaden feet dragging over gravel. The sight kicked up a wholly unfamiliar emotion that made me want to claw my eyes out.

“Mia,” I called out to her, voice pitched low. “A word?”

Recognition flickered on her face as she pulled herself out of her trance, followed by a look of such unfiltered disgust, it hit me like a kick to the solar plexus.

I stepped closer, until the damage slapped me in the face: her eyes were puffy and red, the corner of a packet of tissues peeked out from her pocket, and her shoulders carried a defeated line I’d never seen before.

I could barely meet those red-rimmed eyes.

If she hated me, it was nothing compared to the self-disgust rolling through me, thick and muddy.

I hadn’t paused to consider I might be hurting her—

Lie.

Disgusting lie.

I knew it would hurt. That’s why I said it. I just hadn’t expected to hit a still bleeding wound—or how the damage would gut me, too.

I opened my mouth to apologise and my entire body froze mid-stride. I hadn’t planned on it, couldn’t even remember the last time I’d apologised to someone.

Yet here I was.

Did that slap rearrange my brain or something?

My lungs drew in a deep breath. Her eyes narrowed in clear apprehension, as if anything coming out of my mouth could only twist the knife deeper.

“Look…” I sucked in another shuddering gulp of air that tasted suspiciously like guilt.

“I’m sorry.”

The words came out more aggressive than I’d meant them. I resisted flinching, palms lifting in a placating gesture.

“Can we—”

Talk? Fix it?

“Nah.” Her voice was stripped of anything but ice.

She moved past me like I was invisible, not sparing me a glance.

I wish she’d yelled, hit me, called me names.

A pained breath sawed out of me.

I hadn’t realised how much I’d been counting on a reaction until she gave me none. I wanted to pry that goddamn icy mask off her face and see the mess underneath, though I’d put it there myself.

If I had any sense, I would’ve wondered why the hell this even affected me, but a wild sort of panic crawled up my throat, strangling the air trying to force its way into my lungs.

She turned away.

My fingers curled into a tight fist at my sides as I fought with everything I had not to grab her wrist again and make her look at me, not through me.