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Maddy and I didn’t talk about Vaughan or my Dad for the majority of the week. She was busy with her dance classes and a little preoccupied with Jackson. I didn’t really mind it. Our nights were spent watching some of our favorite series and gossiping about the dance moms who acted like toddler dance classes were far more competitive than they really were. Between her teaching and my last few weeks of classes kept us both busy. Yet another thing I was grateful for because it kept me distracted from what was really going on. I’d seen my Dad once since our talk on Sunday, but it was awkward and we skirted around the real issue — his girlfriend. I wasn’t angry with him, but was still nursing the hurt that came with being kept in the dark by the people I cared about. I hadn’t seen Vaughan since Sunday either and I couldn’t tell if I was avoiding him or of he was avoiding me. I’d been tempted to call him a few times, even just to hear how his day was, but I resisted because it seemed a little strange for me to want to call him. So I gave myself a pep talk about how it was nothing more than a one-night stand, and perfectly acceptable for a woman to treat it like one. Vaughan satisfied a need when I was vulnerable. Simple.

And also complete bullshit.

But I left it at that and carried on with my days.

On Thursday afternoon I finished classes a little earlier and made the trip to the hospital. I hadn’t been to the N.I.C.U in a while and spending the afternoon doing Kangaroo Care sounded perfect. I wiped the light sheen of sweat from my forehead as I walked into the air-conditioned foyer of the hospital, glad that I was wearing a pair of jean cut offs and a white tank top. It was hotter than hell outside and not even the breeze was enough to cool things down. I took the elevator up to the N.I.C.U and smiled when I found Natalie leaning over one of the incubators. She lifted her head and grinned wide. “Kenzi, hi. I wasn’t expecting you today.”

“Sorry.” I shrugged sheepishly. “I should have called first. Must I come back another day? I was hoping to check in on Kyle.”

I’d been so busy with life that hadn’t been by to see the little boy who had crept into my heart my first day of Kangaroo Care.

“You’re always welcome, sweetheart. Come in. You remember the drill right?” She winked, telling me that her reference to my absence as of late wasn’t a jab.

I sat down, and went through the motions, feeling a little giddy. When Natalie held Kyle out for me, I cradled him against my chest, and wrapped the blanket around us. The N.I.C.U was temperature controlled, thank God. I would have been a hot mess otherwise.

“I’ve missed you,” said Natalie, sitting on the recliner opposite me. I caught sight of her growing bump beneath her uniform.

“It’s been a little crazy.”

“Your Dad called me.”

I exhaled, careful not to breath on Kyle’s head. The little guy was watching me and everything inside me softened to mush. But I couldn’t ignore Natalie.

“I haven’t spoken to him in two days. I don’t know what to say to him after the way I behaved on Sunday.”

“He’s not angry with you,” murmured Natalie. “He’s worried about you.”

“I just need a little more time, Nat. I’m still trying to get used to the idea of my Dad with another woman.”

Natalie opened her mouth but shot up out of her seat before she said anything.

“Ava!” she exclaimed. “You’re early.”

It didn’t register immediately, the name of the person who had just come in. I was still getting googley eyes from Kyle, and cooing at him.

“I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t think you’d mind.” The woman had a thick Texan drawl, and when I craned my neck to smile at her, it was her eyes that widened as if she knew me.

“This is…” Natalie hesitated. “This is Kenzi. Kenzi, this is one of our pediatric nurses, Ava.”

Ava. That sounded…

It clicked, and if it weren’t for the small person cradled against my chest I would have stood up as fast Natalie had. The three of us looked at each other, and I evaluated my options. I could ignore her, and pretend for a while longer that she wasn’t the woman in my Dad’s life. Or, I could introduce myself, get to know her, and grant my Dad the happiness he deserves by trying to accept her. I chose option two.

“Hi.”

“Hi darlin’.” She gave me a tentative smile, almost like she wasn’t sure what to make of me. My once-over wasn’t exactly subtle, but she stood tall and allowed me to evaluate her. She was really quite stunning. And petit, with firetruck red hair and soft, round features. Her eyes were a deep chocolate brown with subtle crows feet that told me she smiled a lot.

“Kenzi has been helping us with the Kangaroo Care,” added Natalie. Out of the three of us, she looked the most anxious. Maybe if this had happened a few weeks ago, I would have been anxious too but after a few days I knew I wanted to do the right thing. Even it was hard at first.

“I see that,” replied Ava. “I have some time to kill, mind if I join you?”

“Sure.”

Natalie looked surprised, and as soon as Ava was out of ear shot she whispered, “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

“No, but I have to try, Nat. For my Dad.”

Natalie smiled, and leaned over to kiss the crown of my head. “You make me so proud. Will you be all right here on your own? I have to pee.”