Page 11

The moment I woke up in that hospital bed and realized what happened I knew that I needed to leave. The town where I was born and raised had turned into a place that didn’t feel safe. I would no longer be able to walk down the streets of Las Cruces without continually looking over my shoulder because the protection I had growing up with Sienna died right along with her. I was on my own, so I did the only thing I could think of.

I left.

The distance I put between Las Cruces and myself did nothing to ease the terror I felt every time I closed my eyes at night. The replay of the attack, the feel of their hands on my skin, grew stronger with every nightmare. Years of counseling, of convincing me that I was stronger than the dreams, only did so much. But every time I thought of the good that came out of the horror, I knew that I would survive. Now, as I look at my phone, at a number that I never thought I’d dial again.

“Hello.” Her voice still sounds the same which makes me smile.

Clearing my throat, I speak, “Bianca?”

The line remains silent, and I’m afraid that I’ve called the wrong number. Why would I think that after seven years this number would work? “Tessa? Tessa, mija, is that you?”

I choke out a sob. “Yeah, Bianca, it’s me. Tessa.”

“Oh Dios mío, oh my God,” she cries into the phone which only brings more tears to my eyes. “Tessa, where have you been? Oh, my girl. How are you?”

“I’m good, Bianca.”

“You aren’t good, mija. You aren’t home, so you aren’t good,” she says matter-of-factly.

“That’s not my home anymore, Bianca.”

“Estas loca, you’re crazy. Of course, this is your home. Your familia is here. Your brothers. Me.”

I wipe the tears from my cheeks because she’s right. “Bianca… Um, I’m cal–I’m calling because I think I’ve found Hawk’s mom.”

“Que, what? You’ve seen Rose? Where, mija? Where have you seen her? Veintidós años que esa mujer se fue, twenty-two years that woman has been gone.”

“She’s in a facility that I work at here in Los Angeles—the New Hope Rehabilitation Center. She’s very sick. I–I heard that it’s the result of alcohol abuse. She has his name on her chest.” I realize I’m rambling.

“Aye, mija.”

“The same initials you have on your wrist, they’re on hers too,” I tell her.

“The brand of an old lady. Yes, she has the same as me.”

“I don’t know what to do. But I had to tell someone.”

“And you chose me and not Hawking? Surely you know he’d like to hear this news? That poor boy, all these years he’s been broken, not whole because he’s always felt not good enough for love.”

“He’s had to have found someone by now, Bianca.”

“No one worth anything. The Fallen keep him busy, but his heart is still so empty.”

Her words hurt. The idea of Hawk sleeping with all those women makes me feel nauseous. Why would I think that way? Hawk and I were never anything really. One night. We had one night, and I know he participated out of pity, why else would he…

“Why are you in the corner? No one puts Tessa in the corner.” Hawk gives me his famous smirk as he approaches, taking a seat next to me. Hawking looks good in a grey suit with a crisp white shirt under his jacket instead of his standard outfit of jeans, boots, and MC T-shirt. It’s pretty sad that out of everyone in this school, he’s the only one who has given me any attention since the moment I stepped foot in this place.

I sigh and roll my eyes. “I’ve got nothing better to do,” I say as I throw the cloth napkin on the table. This is our senior year, and I’m supposed to be making memories, but the only thing I’m doing is feeling sorry for myself. I never should have agreed to come. Not when Sienna didn’t want to. I should have listened to her and stayed with her to watch movies, but my mother insisted. I would have had a better time lying on my stomach at home, eating a gallon of ice cream.

“Where’s your date?” I ask.

He throws his head back and laughs while he pats his stomach. “You know better than that, Tessa. No girl can tame me.”

I roll my eyes because I know he’s right. Hawking Gentry, A.K.A. Hawk, is one of the unattainable. He’s the one guy in school who all the girls drool over, including me. His personality along with his trademark ice blue eyes has always gotten him whatever he’s wanted; passing grades in school, excused absences when he was up to no good and into the bed of any girl willing to give it up.

“I didn’t think stag was your style.”

He scoots his chair closer, making sure to lean into me. His arms casually rest on his knees, but his eyes seem dead serious. “What if I told you I only came for one reason?”