Page 49

“Nox might be able to get all of that for us,” Ci says. “We all know I’m the weakest link here. I⁠—”

“Don’t say shit like that,” I growl, annoyed. “We’re all fucked in the head.”

“I sleep like shit and have to take naps like a kid,” Draven says. “I get into a sleep pod, put on my sleep mask, and conk out. It’s the only time I don’t dream about her or the Denton’s fucked up family. We carry the memory of their insanity inside of us and on our skin. None of us escaped without some trauma, Ci. You internalized things more because your parents have done a damn number on you.”

Sometimes, I wonder if we’ll get a call that Ciaran’s parents fucking killed themselves. Their relationship is so damn toxic. One can only hope they’ll take each other out without hurting anyone else.

“I’m not done,” Ci says pointedly. I scrunch my face in apology at him and his lips twitch to show we’re already forgiven. We’re overprotective and over apologize for him. I know he’s fucked up in the past, we all have. “I’ve had this feeling that keeps telling me Noor and I aren’t done yet. Nox wanted to show me once and for all that she was dead and it backfired on him.

“This could be our second chance but we need to fix our bullshit. No more letting her get under our skin. We can’t fucking do the same song and dance anymore. You know I hate the idea of therapy…”

“What if it’s someone privately contracted?” Nox asks, stepping back into the living room. I can smell the scent of food cooking and realize he’s the reason for it. He usually mother hens his brother but I guess we’re getting the full brotherly treatment. I know he doesn’t understand our relationship with Ci, and that’s fine. However, it has to be odd to meet your brother’s boyfriends.

“Go on,” Draven says, eyes narrowing. “We know how easy it is to get into medical records and blow up someone’s life.”

“Not everyone is a dick like you are,” Nox snorts. “However, because we all know the dangers of professional hacking, this guy’s records would be impenetrable because he doesn’t keep any. He has hyperthymesia and remembers everything he hears. He’s a hard-ass and you’ll need to be straight with him. He also doesn’t give a fuck about your illegal activities.”

“How do you know someone like this?” I ask.

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you,” Nox says. While my friends and I aren’t killers, I have an odd feeling Nox may not be able to say the same. We don’t discuss the time he spent in prison.

“Fair enough,” Draven mutters.

“He’s not going to ask you to dig into shit he can’t help you fix. Instead, he’ll help you be able to move on. There’s more ways to do therapy than people think,” Nox says. “Sometimes it’s just about being better than you are today.”

I want to snark back at him but I take a deep breath instead. This is the shit Ci is talking about. We are too quick to snap back at people.

“Did…” I’ve been avoiding asking a very important question because I’m scared shitless that our baby didn’t make it. “This app, did it catch any other footage?”

“You have a son,” Ciaran says softly. “I saw a quick glimpse, but he looks like Noor.”

“I’m glad he looks like her,” I murmur. I expect it makes things easier. “I also don’t have anything. I remember some very smart people reminded me once that we do everything together. We have a son.”

Nox hides a smile as he disappears again and Ci presses a button to show me our son.

“Wow,” I whisper. “He’s tall.”

“I’m not surprised,” Draven chuckles, his eyes drinking in the boy who is looking up at his mother as if she made the world. I suppose she did. “Is there a boot camp to be a better man?”

“If one exists, I’m sure Nox knows about it,” Ci says under his breath. “Prison wasn’t a picnic for him, and he dealt with a lot of bullshit from my father. Mom was a better person back then, but she didn’t stop our father from being abusive. Nox is better regulated than I can ever imagine being.”

“Is she still in California?” I ask, unable to remove my eyes from the screen.

“She is,” Nox says, returning to the room. He pulls his phone out and frowns, scrolling as he looks for something. “Dinner is almost done, and the food is in line with your food plan. Noor is in San Diego, but I couldn’t pull a name or anything from my data banks. Someone has her shit locked down.”

“Her family is crazy,” I mutter. “They are very careful about her safety and will know if we set foot anywhere near her.”

“The trackers are a little excessive, but I would probably have done worse if you’d fucked with my kid,” Nox shrugs. “If I had one.”

“Count your blessings that you never experienced Liliana’s knife work,” Ci shudders.

“She writes crooked,” Draven complains.

“She was pissed because you smelled bad,” I chuckle. “I think she did it on purpose. I also don’t think she wrote the same word for you.”

“What did she write?” Nox asks.

“Mierda,” Draven mutters.