Page 28 of Commanding Blood And Bonds

For the brutal cycle of endings. For never being enough to save her. For breaking a reading that had already been shattered beyond recognition. For the battle that had stolen what she’d so carefully tried to make sacred. For the truth buried beneath centuries of pain. For not being strong enough to push through it.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” she murmured. “It’s not your fault.”

“Kinda is,” I muttered dryly.

“It’s not easy, reliving those things. August...Alec and Fae nearly broke under the reading. Why do you think Ansel and Lana have avoided it for so long? And the horrors in Aren’s mind...Those nearly broke me.”

“What if it’s not worth it?” I finally voiced the fear lodged in my ribs.

“We don’t need to see how many lives we nearly ascended in. We need to know why. Who is interfering? Why, when capturing me would have been infinitely more valuable.”

“It is worth it,” she swore.

“How do you know?”

“I just do,” she whispered. But the torment in her eyes told me she was just as haunted as I was.

And somehow, that only made it worse.

Needing to feel her, I traced my hands over every curve, memorizing the hard lines, the warmth of her beneath my palms.

Cradling her face, I pressed my lips to hers.

“I love you,” I breathed.

“I love you, too.” Her voice wavered, emeralds shining as she met my gaze.

“Take me to dinner?”

“Fuck.” I exhaled in relief. Dinner at some shitty little inn in this nothing mountain town? That sounded like heaven.

“Yes, please.”

Alvara lounged in the passenger seat of the van after dinner, feet propped on the dash, fingers interlaced behind her head. After a much-needed break and a full meal, I felt marginally better as we set off to check another one of Kingsley’s safe houses.

I wasn’t entirely sure of the lyrics to the song playing from her playlist, so instead, I reveled in watching her. Listening. My gaze danced between her and the winding road ahead as it hugged the mountains.

“So we’ll be at Kingsley's tonight?” I finally asked, needing something tangible to focus on before my mind wandered back to darker places.

“Fifty-fifty chance he lets us find him today.” She reached out absentmindedly, long fingers trailing over my arm.

“Eccentric, this Commander?” I pushed, fishing for something.

“More than you know. He knows someone’s coming—has his own gifts—but he hasn’t decided whether he’ll hang around to see us.”

“What kind of gifts?”

“He…senses more than sees what’s coming for him. And he’s a shifter, like Marcus.”

“Is his form top secret too?”

“He has two.”

“Oh.” I hiked a brow, curiosity piqued. “You said our northern cousins were wolves?”

“Yes. His pack.”

“And the second?”