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“You’ll survive,” I say.

“Will I, though?” She lifts her arm off her eyes just enough to glare at me. “Do you even hear yourself? Half this campus would trade a kidney to be in your shoes right now.”

“Then maybe one of them should go to his game instead of me,” I say, and she groans again and chucks a pillow at my head.

“You really don’t get it, do you?” She props herself up on her elbows and looks at me as if I’m a lost cause. “This is the part where you’re supposed to be excited. A little? Even a little bit? I thought you said he was hot.”

“I’m excited about my reading,” I say, which makes her groan.

I shake my head at her and reach for my books. But I can’t stop thinking about Jayden. If he was really inviting all the girls, then why did Aniyah’s friend think it was so important that she had to notify everyone about it?

But I’m sure he’s with a different girl every week, if not every day. Maybe he’s bored, and I’m just the new face and he likes a challenge. Or maybe this is exactly what he does. He picks a girl, turns on his charm, and moves on the second she falls for it.

Whatever it is, I’m not falling for it. I shouldn’t care about a guy who collects girls like trophies. And the worst part is I can still picture the little curve at the corner of his mouth as if he already thought I’d agree to whatever he wanted.

Guys like him count on the fact that his pretty face, the easy grin, and his name are supposed to knock me off my feet. Well, it won’t work on me. He can have his game and his fan club in the stands, but I’ll go if I feel like it, and if I don’t, he won’t even remember he asked.

Probably.

But his eyes are so damn gorgeous.

No! Stop it!

I don’t care. I refuse to have Jayden on my mind.

Chapter 5

JAYDEN

I KNOCK THE BALL FROM one foot to the other and let it drop to the grass, but I look at the stands instead of the goal, searching for Veronica. The seats fill up fast the closer we get to kickoff, and there are a lot of girls in my jersey. A few of them hold up banners with my name, and when I glance their way, they scream and lift their phones to snap pictures of me. I lift a hand to wave, and they lose it, shouting my name as if I just won the whole thing already.

Normally, this is my favorite part. But tonight I just don’t care, because Veronica isn’t out there, and I check the rows over and over like an idiot, searching for her between the banners and the waving arms.

Veronica is nowhere to be seen. I look through the front section, the seats near the tunnel, and even the whole far side, but... nothing. I even check the spots where the latecomers pile in once the seats run out, but she’s not there either. Maybe she’s just hidden behind someone big, but it’s starting to look like she didn’t even come.

Maybe she’s running late. Or maybe she got stuck behind a slow line at the gate. Who knows? But I told her to come, and no girl has ever not shown up. One smile and most of them will do whatever I ask, because they know my attention opens every door on this. So where the fuck is Veronica?

I roll my shoulders and try to shake it off as the rest of the guys finish their warmups around me. Montoya’s hammering shots into the corner of the net, Walton’s stretching out his hamstrings, and the keeper’s diving around as if he’s got something to prove. And I’m half warming up, half scouring the crowd for a freshman who’s... What? Ignoring me? Forgot about me?

Maybe she really forgot. Unless she’s the type who says okay just to end a conversation she doesn’t want to have, and she had zero intention of ever showing up. Or maybe it’s all a game for her. Maybe she’s playing hard to get, which would actually be kind of smart if that’s what she’s doing. But she didn’t seem to be playing anything.

Once the game starts, I try to focus, but it’s not working. Walton wins the ball in midfield and sends a perfect pass up to me, and I’ve got a clean shot at the net. Easy. I strike the ball, but right as I make contact, my eyes flick up to the crowd, and the ball sails wide past the goal.

I curse under my breath. What the fuck was that?

When I get free, Montoya slides the ball across to me, and I’ve got the keeper one-on-one. All I have to do is slot it past him. But I rush it, and instead of placing it in the corner, I just blast it straight at his chest. He scoops it up and I’m left wondering what’s wrong with me. I never miss two like that in a row. Never. And the whole reason is some girl who isn’t even here to see any of it.

I need to just play and forget about Veronica. But it’s impossible to keep my gaze on the ball because I can’t stop glancing at the stands.

If my teammates ever figured out their captain was missing the open net because some freshman wasn’t at the game, they’d never let me hear the end of it.

The rest of the half goes by and I basically do nothing. I look for her between plays anyway, every time the ball goes to the other end, and it’s pathetic, but I can’t help it. She’s just not here, and somehow knowing that ruins my game, because I can’t stop checking the crowd instead of watching the ball.

By the time the second half starts, I’ve mostly given up on finding her, so I try to do my actual job. I link up with Walton, make my runs, and pull two defenders with me to open space for the others. And in the end, it’s Montoya who gets on the end of a cross and buries it into the net, and the crowd goes wild. Everyone’s screaming his name now, and the guys hug him by the corner flag. I jog over to pat his back.

We hold the lead from there, and when the final whistle blows, we win. The crowd’s on their feet, chanting and waving banners, and any other night, I’d soak up every second of it. But I’m not feeling it tonight. Montoya won us the game and the crowd loves him for it, and good for him, but all I can think about is Veronica not being here.

It’s stupid. She’s just my task, and getting this worked up over whether she watched me play isn’t part of any plan I’ve got. It’s all about control, and feelings have nothing to do with it. But it still bugs me and I want to know why she didn’t come, so after I shower and change in the locker room, I intend to find out.