Page 40

Coldness envelops me when he leaves, despite the sunbeam I stand in. It's strange to have the one person I know well enough just walk out the door, leaving me with an almost stranger in a strange apartment in a country I don't know.

It's dizzying to think of everything all at once—Mario and Cassian, Valentina, Illyana and her illness, the fact that Cassian was talking like he and Valentina are part of some sort of organization. All I see is a tangle of chaos, but both Cassian and Valentina act like there's a clear thread to follow.

I fight a yawn and remove the towel from my hair, shaking my head as my hair, almost dry from the heat, cascades in waves around my shoulders. As it settles, Valentina reappears with a bag in one hand and she tilts her head.

"Come on."

"Hm? Aren't we… aren't we waiting for Cassian to get back?"

"Yes, but we're not waiting here. We can't take the risk that Mario was tracing that call or Cassian's cell. So we're leaving."

"To where?"

"Somewhere safer."

"Will Cassian be able to find us?"

"Yes."

"Do you think he will be okay?"

"I know he will."

Valentina answers all of my questions as we slip down a metal fire escape at the back of the building and arrive in an alley warmed by the sun. She answers all of my questions and despite how curtly she speaks, she doesn't seem to mind how I quick-fire them at her. A silver car sits near the mouth of the alley and Valentina leads me toward it. Then she ushers me inside and we leave that small apartment behind.

My heart pounds like a drunken rabbit, fast and awkward.

Cassian told me to trust her, but what if he's wrong and she's taking me back to Mario? What if she's taking me somewhere else?

I sneak her a sidelong glance, briefly focusing on the scar on her forehead. She's so beautiful, glamorous like out of a magazine, yet the muscle definition on her arms is as clear as day. I've never noticed it before, though she's never spent much time in my restaurant. She always orders takeout.

"Do you think badly of me?" I ask suddenly.

Valentina glances at me while her hand glides around the steering wheel. "Why would I?"

"For losing my baby."

"Are you asking me that because I'm a woman?"

"I…” I hesitate and then shrug as my hands come together in my lap. "You look strong. You look like you wouldn't let something like this happen to you."

Valentina remains silent until we pull up to a red light, then she sighs softly. "Okay. Firstly, you didn't let it happen. It happened to you, and you had no control. You also didn't lose your baby, she was stolen from you. I understand that the effect they've had on you has you placing blame squarely on your own shoulders, but that's misplaced, okay? What happened to you is not your fault. No matter what age you were, no matter how you reacted to protect yourself, none of it. I don't think badly of you at all."

The car moves off once more.

"You were a baby, Sabina. People took advantage of you and hurt you. That's not on you, it's on them. And we will find them and we will make them pay." She glances at me once more. "No one lets this kind of stuff happen to them, no matter how strong they are. And while I look strong to you, things happen to me. I nearly died. I lost my memory and nearly lost everyone I care about because greedy cunts were so intent on making money selling people. But I survived and so will you."

Tears sting behind my eyelids and out of every kind word from Valentina, one sticks out the most. The blame has been on my shoulders for ten years because I had nowhere else to put it. Blame weighed down the guilt when I started rebuilding my life. It almost makes me feel even guiltier to try and place the blame elsewhere.

"I'm sorry."

Valentina glances at me again and smiles slightly. "Don't be sorry. Not to me. Not to Cassian. And you don't need to worry. You're not alone anymore."

Her words stick with me as we arrive in a small, dusty parking lot and she leads me up a narrow staircase into another apartment that unlocks with a key she already has. I want to ask how she knew to come here, or how she even has a key if we weren't going to move until that phone call, but the words don't come.

I'm only grateful that she's here.

Excusing myself, I hurry into the bathroom and close the door to give myself a moment of peace.