Page 407 of Commanding Scythe and Sky

“You would’ve found me.”

“Statistically unlikely. I would’ve been deployed to get rid of you when Lonan or Reagan identified the threat.”

I snorted, barely containing the laugh at his unbothered delivery. “You could try,” I countered, earning the tiniest twist of his lips.

“So, we’d end up blade to blade, likely with an immediate threat to your parents.”

“And you’d realize who I was, just like you did this time.”

“That was different.”

“Let’s not pretend you were fond of me when that bond reared its head.”

He smirked. “Always did love a challenge.”

“Case in point. You would’ve found me.”

“And then what? It couldn’t have meant anything.”

“I think Nix is acutely aware of how deeply you revere the accords around bonds—even those that should mean nothing.”

“Nix,” he scoffed bitterly, taking another swig of liquor. “He was down bad for you as a kid. Did I ever tell you that?”

“What?!” I scoffed. “He was a total prick.”

“I didn’t say his fascination was healthy.”

“He just liked that I didn’t give a shit about your little club of assholery.”

“Nah.” He shook his head, eyes almost affectionate. “You were beauty and innocence in a life without it. Of course he wanted you.”

“To ruin me,” I muttered bitterly, but Cyrus was shaking his head.

“To possess you. Protect you from the childhood he had. Or at least… it started that way. In Nix and Carr’s experience, pretty things got broken and exploited. And you were beautiful enough that every one of us noticed you.”

If I was honest, aside from noting he was a total jerk, I didn’t really give Nix more than a blink of attention. He’d been entirely overshadowed by ‘Crew’—my focus fixed on his cousin, blurring the rest of them into a unit.

An uneasy, oily sensation settled in my gut, but I held his eyes as he explained, “Their uncle, maternal side, groomed Nix from the time we were five and six. Carr doesn’t talk about it, but things were headed that way for him too until Nix stepped in. His anger wasn’t borne from nothing. It doesn’t justify his actions now, but… while I was burying my head in the sand, writing to you this year, I found myself wondering…”

“Who he would’ve been.”

“Yeah. Who we’d all be if our parents had been different. If we’d been kept safe. Modeled love rather than duty. Maybe my cousin wouldn’t have been such a fucking dick. Maybe he wouldn’t have felt the need to put us down, to prove his superiority, if his sense of self hadn’t been broken.”

Not sure I wanted the answer, I asked, “What happened to the uncle?”

“How do you think Nix earned his Wings?”

“Jesus.”

“Revenge is part of the human condition. You’re not broken. And one way or another, we would’ve ended up colliding. Do I wish things had been different? Of course. But your choices gave me the opportunity to see how you work, how you think, before you executed Reagan. Had you just been some Grayshellian who cut her down in the field, there would’ve been no doubt in my mind you needed to be dealt with. I dunno if even the bond could’ve overridden my own drive for revenge.”

“What are you saying?”

“That maybe Alec is right.”

He gently slipped his hand into mine, squeezing my fingers as I breathed, “There are no coincidences. Your anger—that betrayal—was not reignited coincidentally. I once told you the universe had bigger things at play when it bound us together. I meant it. Even if it took a while for me to remember it through my… disappointment.”

And then his lips were on mine. As carefully as if he were cradling a cracked porcelain heirloom, Cyrus held my face in his broad hands like he was afraid I’d break. “It’s that humanity I always envied about The Wraith,” he breathed, brushing a featherlight kiss over one cheek with a tenderness so violent it undid me. Through everything we’d been through, I wasn’t sure he was capable of being this gentle. I wasn’t sure I liked it. “Your reputation undersells your sense of justice—the heart behind it.”