Page 45 of A Tragic Melody

“Oh, go fuck yourself and take your twelve steps bullshit with you.”

“Fuck myself, huh? How would that make you feel? Knowing for once a man might enjoy his own hand over you?”

“Good, if it’s your hand.” I shrug.

“What does that mean?”

“It means if I’m going to lose to a hand, it might as well be one that knows how to play as well as you. But Wyatt,” I lean forward, letting my mouth rest by his ear, “I’m much better than your hand.”

He turns his head, looking right into my eyes. His brown eyes are full of rage, confidence, and a bit of desire.

“Fine then. Show me.”

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Being nice to Tuesday is difficult when one minute she is showing me there is more to her than just a drug-fueled demon, and the next she is throwing punches.

I don’t know why I even bother to show her any compassion when I know any chance she gets, she is going to torture me. She is plotting my downfall, for crying out loud, but still, each time I see a glimpse into her fragile heart, I’m pulled in.

She likes to hide how damaged she is. Wants to pretend she is closed off and cold, but she continues to reveal little pieces of her soul to me. It drives me crazy, because she could get better, she just refuses to. I’d kill just to show her there’s another way than being like this, but what’s the point? She clearly knows it, just doesn’t want to put in the effort.

It makes me irrationally mad. It’s the reason I don’t like her, but I also can’t bring myself to hate her.

Her words sting. She wants them to, too. Her intent to destroy me has been evident since the start of the tour. She is untouchable, completely off limits unless I want to bite the hand that feeds me.

Yet, I asked for vulnerability and secrets. And she gave me both. Maybe not exactly how I wanted them, but the hurt in her voice let me know it took a lot for her to say it. She tried to come across unbothered by her own statement, but it was there. You don’t sit there crying one second, then drop all that without it meaning something. I can’t help but feel a tug on my soul.

I don’t know if anyone can fix her, but just for a moment, I really wanted to try.

Then she threw it all in my fucking face, and all I want to do is strangle her. I wish I could just shake the stubbornness out of her. Let her see I don’t have to be the enemy, but nothing is going to get through to her. Nothing I say, not even when I’m singing her praises, means anything to her.

Except when I asked her to show me that she’s better than my hand.

That got a reaction from her. Her eyes lit up like she just cracked the code. I didn’t mean it. I was just being an ass, figuring whatever happened between Hendricks and her would make her pull back and leave me alone. But I fear there was more truth in her confession than I knew.

She likes sucking cock, it makes her feel good, and that’s not good for me.

She slides to the ground in front of me, and I fight the urge to vomit. It’s not that she looks bad kneeling before me, it’s the exact opposite—she looks really good on her knees in front of me.

A wicked smile crosses her face, and there’s a shine to her gray eyes. It’s exotic and tempting, and I can’t bring myself to speak right now.

Her hands slide up my thighs, moving to my belt. She quickly undoes it, moving to the button of my jeans.

I need to stop her. Need to end this before it destroys me, but I’m not sure how.

She tugs down the zipper, eyes glued to my face.

“You want me to show you?” she asks.

“No.” My voice is barely a whisper. My whole body is frozen as she tucks her hand through the break in my zipper.

When was the last time I’ve been with a girl? It had to have been months ago, and at least a year ago since I actually enjoyed it.

“No?” Her hand rubs over my cock. It’s half hard already, and I’d be embarrassed if it wasn’t fear that keeps it from stiffening more. “But you just said...” She licks her lips before flashing me an evil smile. “Are you lying, Wyatt? I didn’t take you for a liar.”

“Tues…” I groan when her hand squeezes my cock through my boxers. “I don’t fuck people on drugs.”

“Anymore,” she corrects. “You don’t fuck anyone on drugs anymore.”