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“I should’ve gone to therapy, but I wasn’t ready. My doctor prescribed pills I didn’t take. Getting help then felt like giving in, admitting I was a loser who couldn’t keep it together on her own. Obviously, I know better now. There’s no shame in getting help. There’s no shame in being a work in progress.”

“Too right. Seeing my therapist is the smartest thing I’ve ever done.” His brows creased. “I hate that you felt you couldn’t tell me…”

“But that’s why I’m telling you now.” Her eyes widened, hoping Mark was on the same page. “Things are different now, right?”

“Things are different now. No more secrets, no more hiding the truth. We both have to communicate more, yeah? Be upfront about what’s going on with work, what we’re feeling, even if it’s not all champagne and roses.” He kissed her softly. “So, what did you do…about your anxiety?”

“Two weeks before Christmas, everything was piling on top of me…I could barely hold it together. I was selling things to pay rent and buy gifts. Theatres were ignoring my emails…”

“Oh, babe…”

“A panic attack started over the stupidest thing—a ribbon I couldn’t curl on Lucy’s Christmas present. I couldn’t breathe, I was shaking…so, I took a pill and felt…calmer…but also dizzy, and my sight was blurry. I took one every day hoping the side effects would fade, but they didn’t. I stopped taking them on Boxing Day. I thought they’d be out of my system by New Year’s, and I could have a drink…”

Mark propped himself up on his elbow. “Lex! Is that why—”

“Yeah.” Alex nodded sheepishly. “I’d never intentionally get hammered in front of your castmates. I mean, really…I picked the lamest drink on the menu.”

“I wondered how mojitos could be so deadly!”

“I won’t make that mistake again! I know I’ll never be cured of my anxiety, but at least I’ve found a way to manage it.”

“I’m so proud of you, Lex.” Mark smiled kindly. “Okay, here’s something else you should know…I didn’t hurt myself in a snowball fight. I fell from a horse.”

Her eyes widened. “I knew it!”

“And…I dislocated my shoulder.”

“Oh, Mark!” She rubbed his arm. “I knew it was something serious.”

“I knew you did, but that didn’t stop me from carrying on the snowball charade! I only did it to keep you from worrying.”

Alex frowned. “See? Lying is too much work. It’s exhausting.”

Mark shifted closer, his hand stroking her ass. “I’d rather conserve my energy for more pleasurable pursuits…”

Alex gave him a lingering kiss.

“Christ, eight months…I’ve missed so much. You’ve written a graphic novel. You now like Thai food! You jog, have two plays slated for the stage next year…is there anything else I’ve missed, Miss Overachiever?”

“Well, I quit jogging. Hated it! I fast-walk instead. Oh…I binge-watched every episode of Friends.”

“You didn’t? Well, that’s unbelievably hot.” He raised an eyebrow. “How you doin’?”

Alex giggled. “You’re the overachiever.” Nose to nose, she kissed his lips as her fingers played in his hair. “I can’t believe you learned Portuguese.”

“Just a little for Throttle. I’ve already forgotten most of it, although this might come in handy: Você está me deixando excitada.”

She shrugged. “No clue.”

“You’re making me horny.” He grinned mischievously.

“You don’t have to say it.” Her gaze slid downwards to her thigh. “I can feel it.”

Mark laughed. “I’m quite relieved I don’t have to say that line on film, though. Not exactly Ibsen, is it?”

“Not even close.” She looked up through her bangs.

“Speaking of Ibsen…” He weaved his fingers through her hair. “I’m gonna need some help learning lines…”

“No…really?!”

Mark couldn’t contain his smile. “Yeah! I’ve been cast in A Doll’s House.”

“That’s at the Old Vic!”

“Yep. Performances start in February. I’m the male lead—I’m playing Torvald.”

“Mark!”

“I don’t know what I’m excited about more…the role, or the fact that I’ll get to sleep in my own bed for the foreseeable! I can’t remember what that’s like.”

“But this play…it’s a classic. Wow!”

“I know! Can you believe it? Me, on stage at the Old Vic. I’m still gobsmacked. This never would’ve happened if I was still with Wink, you know? My new agent is totally in sync with what I want to do—and when, and the timing is perfect. Lairds series four shoots in October, so I can prep for the play from November onwards…so get used to me being around—a lot.”

“I think I could get very used to that.” Alex smiled, hugging him tightly.