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“They hurt Trevor.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I heard them.”
The room went silent, and I tried to jerk out of Darius’s hand but it only loosened a smidge. The stubborn fucker wouldn’t let go.
“What do you fucking want to do? Go to jail?” he asked.
I stared at him. “I heard them, Dee.” My throat tightened. “I wasn’t fast enough.”
Trevor closed his eyes, and I immediately wished I hadn’t said it.
Darius looked at him. Then back at me. “What did you hear?”
I swallowed the words down before replying, “Trevor is a good fucking kid. I’ll get those names eventually. Someone will do their goddamn job and keep these kids safe.”
Dee’s expression went flat. Dangerously flat, like they did that night I attacked him outside his window, and I stepped closer.
“You were supposed to be here, Darius. These kids are our responsibility.”
“I know that.”
“Then where the fuck were you? Where have you been?”
His eyes flashed. Anger. Disappointment. In himself? Me? Who the fuck knew anymore? “I said I was handling something,” he forced out between clenched teeth.
“You’re always handling something!”
Trevor peeked up and Mason squeezed his hand.
I lowered my voice. “You disappear. It’s what you’re good at, so just do that. Go fucking disappear. I’ve got this. Alone. As per usual.”
Darius went still. “This isn’t about us,” he whispered.
“No.” I pointed at Trevor. “It’s about him getting hurt while you were gone doing whatever or whoever the fuck you were doing.”
Darius stared at me. “So this is my fault?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You basically did.”
“Maybe because I’m tired of carrying your fucking half of everything. You’re exhausting. I can’t exist being half of my fucking self for you to somehow feel whole. You need to wake the fuck up, Darius.”
“So do you,” he replied and appeared to regret it.
I looked at Trevor. Then at myself in the reflection of the fucking metal cabinets filled with cotton balls and whatever other bullshit. There was mud on my shoes. Open cuts across my knuckles and my own hand dripping blood every time my heart beat. My sweatshirt was still wrapped around Trevor’s waist so I was half-naked. Covered in sweat, dirt, and leaves that I took with me when I’d stormed those damn woods.
But the one thing I noticed more than anything else was the fact I stood alone. I looked back at Dee, who was picking at his pants.
“You’re right. I do need to wake up.” I stepped farther away from him. “You’re completely fucking right.”
“That isn’t what I meant…”
“I should’ve opened my eyes well before now.” I turned to Trevor and let the angry tears drip off my chin. “I’m so fucking sorry, kid. I should’ve known.”
“You couldn’t have,” he insisted.
