Page 10 of His Winter Wonderland

She had no idea what he was talking about. She didn’t even know if she could trust the words he was saying. This could all be part of her imagination. She wanted it so badly, the universe was bringing it to life. And as soon as that hope began to build in her, it would snatch it away. Fuck you, Karma. Fuck you, tears. She removed her hand from his face to wipe her eyes.

“Why are you crying?” He asked.

“Because this isn’t real.”

“I’m real.” He grabbed her hand and placed it against his chest. “Do you feel that?”

She waited. And waited.

He took a deep breath. “Feel it?”

She shook her head. “I don’t feel a heartbeat.”

He released her hand. “I wasn’t talking about a heartbeat. I was asking whether or not you could feel me breathing.”

Just as she thought. It wasn’t real. He didn’t have a heartbeat. “If it was real, you’d have a heartbeat.”

“I…”

Suddenly her body felt heavy. She knew what that meant. It meant she was about to wake up. Her gaze locked with his. He always looked sad when she left him. This time, he looked panicked.

“Not yet,” he said, reaching for her.

He grabbed her arm. She didn’t pull away. She knew that even if he held onto her as tight as he could, he wouldn’t be able to keep her there. Real or not, there was nothing he could do to stop her from waking up.

“Don’t leave me yet,” he begged.

“I can’t stop it.” And right now, she didn’t want to. She wanted to wake up so that she could cry alone, instead of in front of him. She wanted to wallow in the pain of knowing that she’d never experience this in real life.

Still holding her tightly, he told her, “I’ll find you. Tell me where you are. Somehow, I’ll escape this hell and find you. I’ll…”

It was too late. The sound of rushing water was drowning out his words. The bottom dropped from under her and she was falling, ripped away from him. Winter closed her eyes and let the dream take her. When she reopened them, she was lying in her bed, staring up at her ceiling.

Tears dripped from the corner of her eyes. She didn’t wipe them away. There was no need. They’d only be replaced by more tears. Winter remained that way for hours. She didn’t get up until it was time for her to check on the potion she’d made yesterday. It was almost ready. Tonight, she wouldn’t get to see Rhen.

Tonight, she had to go out to meet a customer. Maybe it was a good thing she wouldn’t see him. They needed some time apart. Or rather, she needed some time in the real world. Living in her fantasy land was starting to take its toll on her. It was starting to make her wish for things she couldn’t have. Lying in bed, she waited for night to come. Though she tried not to think about Rhen, her mind kept drifting back to him.

“Oh, how I wish you were real,” she whispered. “I’d give anything to have you hear with me. I’d given anything to really be your mate, Rhen Fujisaki.”

Winter wiped her eyes. “No more crying,” she told herself. “It’s time to put on your game face and venture out into the Frostlands. You can’t let the creatures out there see your tears. They’ll think you’re weak. They’ll think you’re an easy prey. And you’re not. You’re the Winter Goddess, Keeper of the Spirit of War. You’re a badass who doesn’t need love. All you need is yourself, and your beast.”

The tattoo on her neck grew hotter. Her beast agreed with her. Pep talk complete and feeling more like herself, Winter got up and got dressed. No more thinking about Rhen Fujisaki. It was time to sell a potion and collect her funds. It was time to say goodbye to dreamland and hell to the Frostlands.

Fuck my life.

Chapter Four

Winter

She was being followed.

The soft crunch of footsteps in the snow about three feet behind her was too low to be that of one of the woodland creatures. And too loud to be the footsteps of the wilden-beasts who roamed this area. They sounded more like the footsteps of a warlock. Or maybe a shifter who was in his skin form.

She didn’t know what type of creature it was. However, her hunter senses told her it was one that walked upright on two feet. Its steps were stuttered. One… two. One… two. The wilden-beasts and other four-legged creatures stepped to a different beat. One. Two… Three. Four. One. Two… Three. Four.

Any hunter would notice those subtle differences. Winter stopped walking and pretended to stare up at the night sky, allowing the creature a chance to move closer to her. A light snow had begun to fall. The tiny flakes kissed her face before melting against her skin. Snow kisses.

That was what Rhen liked to call the first few flakes that fell from the sky and dropped onto her face. Whenever her dream took them to her cabin in the Frostlands, he would complain about the snow and how cold it was. He would say he’d rather be in the Wastelands. He always referred to the Frostlands as hell.