Page 79 of These Wicked Hearts

Why? You barely played tonight.

Atlas: Mean! I played enough. Do you know how much work it is to skate like that? That’s how I got this gorgeous ass! Put some respect on the game.

I don’t know much about hockey, but I’m assuming it’s bad when your team spends most of the time defending instead of scoring

Atlas: OUCH that was uncalled for!!

True but uncalled for

Ugh I wish you were here to massage my legs for me

Why would you assume I’d massage them if I was?

Atlas: No, you’re right, you’d be massaging other things, if you know what I mean

Atlas: My balls. I meant my balls.

No, I got it

Atlas: I need to go shower

Good. I can’t imagine how bad you smell right now

Atlas: Excuse me! This is the scent of athletic perfection!

Well, go take your athletically potent ass into a shower. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

Atlas: I hate the bus more than the plane, I think.

What are you doing today?

I’m going to try and write today

Atlas: Write about me. How hot I am

How smart

Kind

Adorable

Annoying. Loud. Obnoxious.

Atlas: Write me a song we can share with our grandkids.

I don’t want kids.

Atlas: Neither do I. I was talking about the six bullmastiffs we’ll have.

And where we will be keeping these giant dogs?

Atlas: On our farm of course.

I feel my phone vibrate in my hand. “You see,” he says, without missing a beat the second I answer. “We’ll have this house on all this land, like tons of room. I’ve always lived in a city with no yard. We’ll have a farm, but it’ll be all dogs. A dog rescue.”

“A dog rescue?” I laugh, sitting on my couch.

“Yeah, and we’ll have all this room. You’ll have a studio, and I’ll have my comic room. Then maybe I’ll build a rink⁠—”