Page 77 of Pure Recklessness

Downright stupid.

But the next, I was imagining all of the filthy things I wanted to do to her.

I needed help.

And most importantly, I needed to make sure that something like this never happened again.

30

ELLIE

My fingers hovered over the keyboard as I attempted to type the first line of a press release.

I’d been staring at the computer screen for an hour and hadn’t written a single word.

My stomach was in knots. I couldn’t concentrate. All I could think of was how I’d humiliated myself in my boss’s office on Friday night.

What was I thinking?

Did I honestly believe that the CEO of a multi-billion-pound company was going to risk his reputation to sleep with me?

Yes, I’d felt some kind of electricity in the air.

Yes, he’d looked at me like he was interested.

And yes, he had an erection, but he was a man. He probably got a hard-on thinking about what to eat for breakfast. It didn’t mean anything.

Just because he was aroused, that didn’t mean that he’d actually act on it.

Mr Devlin could have any woman in the world, so why was I delusional enough to think that he’d want me just because I’d flashed him my knickers like a teenage girl flirting with a boy in the playground?

I covered my face with my hands and winced.

So stupid.

After I’d left his office, I’d bolted out of the building, then called Dana to apologise and let her know I’d had to leave because I wasn’t feeling well. That wasn’t a lie. The humiliation was sickening.

As soon as I’d got home, I’d showered, pulled the duvet over my head and stayed there. I didn’t even eat dinner. I couldn’t.

I spent the whole weekend fretting and the temptation to call in sick this morning was strong, but I had to own my mistake. So I’d put my big girl knickers on and dragged myself to the office.

I’d half expected to arrive and find all my belongings packaged up. But everything was still in its place.

All day I’d been waiting for a call from HR to tell me I was being fired. I thought I’d at least get a stern email from Mr Devlin expressing his disappointment regarding my actions.

But so far, nothing.

I should be thrilled that I’d been given an opportunity to write a press release for a new book, but instead I was sitting here, worrying.

Not knowing when I’d be getting the boot was driving me crazy.

I dialled Valerie’s number.

‘Mr Devlin’s office, this is Valerie speaking, how may I help you?’

‘Hi, Valerie,’ I said. ‘This is Eleanor… Lewis.’

‘Hello, dear. How can I help?’