Page 42 of Somewhere Only We Know

Shila showed me to a seat at a table in front of the house and dashed inside to make tea. Hom followed her and returned carrying a half-bald chicken. He handed the chicken to me unceremoniously and burst into a fit of giggles when I tucked it under my arm and stroked its patchy feathers.

Govinda reappeared, shouted at Hom and gave me a dazzling smile – at least it would have been if he’d had more than one front tooth. He removed the chicken from my grasp and set it down on the ground.

‘Tea!’ announced Shila, setting a loaded tray on the table.

She handed me a mug and I inhaled the steam; lemon and ginger. Govinda looked on in disbelief when I turned down the offer of sugar, and tipped three big spoonfuls into his own.

‘Please,’ said Shila, pushing a plate of plain biscuits towards me.

Govinda stopped stirring his tea, waiting to see if I took one. I wished I knew more about guest protocol in Nepal; perhaps it was rude to say no to anything. I took a biscuit to be on the safe side.

‘What do you do for a living, Govinda?’ I asked. I took a sip of my tea while Shila translated.

Hom climbed up onto his grandfather’s lap and laid his head on the old man’s chest.

‘He build houses again after the earthquake,’ Shila told me. She turned to her father and said something else. Govinda waved a hand at her irritably and said something in reply. Shila frowned at him and banged her mug down on the table.

‘What are you saying?’ I wanted to know.

‘I said that he works too hard and I am afraid that one day he will die and I will be alone with no money. My father says that I should find a husband and he will look after me. I am not going to do that.’ Shila shook her head defiantly. ‘Ever.’

‘Would that be such a bad thing?’ I suggested.

‘A new husband will not love Hom like his own son. I would rather be alone than have a marriage like that. I can look after myself and Hom.’

My heart went out to her. I had had almost this exact conversation with Kat a decade ago. ‘I totally understand,’ I said softly.

She and I were from totally different backgrounds, but we shared a fiercely independent streak, and a desire to put our own potential happiness to one side for the sake of our children.

Govinda gave Hom a biscuit and spoke again.

‘He wants to know if you are married,’ said Shila.

I shook my head. ‘Like you, I didn’t want to be married either, but it seems to be easier for a woman in the UK to make her own choices about her life than here. I was able to be a mother and have a job to earn money to look after us both.’

Shila repeated this to him and the conversation became heated. I felt awful for causing this conflict, but I only hoped that my presence would help Shila in some way.

Shila turned to me to explain. ‘My father thinks that the men in our village must do the work and I argue and say this is not true in every family.’

I took some of the things I’d bought out of their bags. I showed them the beautiful gifts I planned to take back to England with me. ‘These are all made by local women from Chitwan. The ladies make money so that their husbands can relax at home.’ I mimed putting my feet up and closing my eyes. Govinda laughed this time.

‘He thinks you are funny lady. He says that his father taught him that he must look after his family. He is a proud man.’ Shila shook her head. ‘When my grandfather was alive, my father argued with him all the time, saying that times change and the old man was wrong. Now my father is the same as him.’

‘Govinda,’ I said, leaning forward to address him directly, ‘we want more for each new generation that comes along. When Hom is a man he could go to university, travel to America, become a doctor, anything he wants. Your daughter wants to earn her own money, to buy things for her son. She wants to provide for Hom the way you provided for Shila. She wants a chance to show you what she can do.’

While she relayed what I’d said, I pulled out the leaflet I’d picked up from the market. ‘Shila, you do not have to do this alone. There are people – women – who can help you, who want to nurture talent like yours, to bring more employment to the village.’

‘I know about this, but he does not listen to me,’ she said sadly.

‘I had a daughter once,’ I said. ‘She was the most precious thing in the world to me. The biggest mistake I made was to not listen to her. Loving someone means allowing them to do what their heart is telling them, even if it hurts to do so.’

Govinda shook his head and spoke again.

Shila sighed. ‘He says he doesn’t understand why you care.’

‘I care because having a goal gives you purpose and having a purpose makes you feel happy. We only have one chance at life, and we all deserve happiness.’

‘My father says you are a very wise woman.’