Page 135 of The Sunrise Sisterhood

‘And neither is Patrick, from what I can see.’

‘True.’ Clare smiled at that. Patrick Delmarge was an old-school romantic and Liz was giggly with the newness of their relationship. He sent flowers, he phoned at bedtime to wish her goodnight and he escorted her to the door after their dates, even when it meant driving for fifty minutes back to East Portlemouth when they’d gone out in his car. It was early days with them, but she’d never seen Liz so happy, and she really hoped it worked out for them.

Then there was her supper club idea, which Clare absolutely loved. She still remembered the stories her mum used to tell her about Liz and Jen’s student days and how much the pair of them had loved entertaining their friends in their tiny student flat. This seemed like the perfect next step for Liz, combining all the things she loved: Clemency House, cooking and company; and she knew that her mum would approve too.

While she and Skye were at the hospital this morning, Liz and Patrick were taking Ivy over on the ferry to the beach. Three whole hours where Ivy would be out of her sight and out of her control and she wasn’t even panicking about it. If there was one thing that breaking her arm had succeeded in doing, it was to give her the freedom to start accepting help. Which was fortunate, seeing as she’d be going back to Bath soon for the start of term and her arm wouldn’t be strong enough to manage everything by herself.

She’d thought about asking Skye to move in with her for a few weeks, just until her arm was mobile again, but it wouldn’t be fair on her. Not now that she and Marta were growing closer.

Clare watched Skye fondly as she started the car and reversed out of the drive. She was unrecognisable from the timid creature who’d rocked up to Clemency House, weighed down by decisions she didn’t want to make, trying to please everyone and putting herself last. Now look at her, blossoming, confident and in charge of her life.

‘What?’ said Skye, catching her eye.

‘Nothing,’ she replied. ‘Just looking at my amazing sister. Right, let’s get to my X-ray appointment to see if my broken arm is mended. I might get them to take a look at my heart while they’re at it. See if there’s any chance of that getting unbroken any time soon.’

Clare looked at the X-ray of her arm which the doctor had pulled up onto his computer screen. There was a thicker bit where the fracture was, the bones laying down new calcium deposits apparently.

‘It’s healing nicely,’ said the doctor. ‘Well done. Time to remove that brace, put you in a collar and cuff. I’ll leave you with the nurse.’

The nurse was Pam, who’d looked after her when she’d first had her accident. Pam fixed a neoprene sling around Clare’s neck with Velcro, adjusting it until it felt comfortable.

‘You can start to remove it for periods of time now, let your arm hang. You need to retain as much movement in your elbow as possible,’ she told her.

Clare winced. ‘OK.’ The idea of removing all protection when Ivy was anywhere near her gave her the collywobbles. If she ended up undoing the healing of her arm, she didn’t know what she’d do.

‘And we need to arrange some physio, but I can see from your home address that you’re not local?’ said Pam.

Clare nodded. ‘I’ll be going back to Bath soon.’

The nurse studied her. ‘I’d have expected you to be happier about your progress, but you seem a bit down. Major trauma such as you’ve been through can lead to depression in some cases. Have you been having dark thoughts?’

‘Not depressed. Just …’ Clare swallowed, horrified to find she was on the brink of tears. Bloody hospital, her emotions always made their way to the surface when she was here.

‘Talk to me,’ said the nurse, handing her a tissue.

Which was how Clare came to tell Pam about a one-night stand in a hotel which led to a baby who was born while she was grieving for her mother and the surprise discovery of the baby’s daddy, who she still had feelings for and with whom she’d completely blown it.

‘I want him to be there at Ivy’s first birthday party – not for me, but for her.’

Pam raised her eyebrows. ‘Really?’

‘OK, a bit for me. But I can’t find the words to invite him. He’s missed out on a whole year of her life and if I could turn back the clock I would, but I can’t.’

‘Can’t you just tell him that?’

‘I’ve tried.’ She sighed and her eyes roamed over the desk. There was a framed photograph of Pam looking absolutely knackered holding a newborn baby.

The nurse followed her gaze and smiled. ‘My son, Marcus, just after he was born. I look at it every day and I still can’t believe how lucky I am.’

A light bulb went off in Clare’s head. ‘Oh my God. I can send him photos! Let him see her entire first year in pictures. I can’t turn the clock back, but I can show him what she’s been up to since she was born. Thank you, nurse!’

Pam looked bemused. ‘Any time.’

Clare stood up and opened the door, before remembering where she was. ‘Oh sorry, are we done?’

‘We’re done,’ Pam said with a laugh. ‘Good luck.’

It took Clare a couple of hours once she’d got back to Salcombe to sort through her phone and get everything together for her letter to Adam. This time, she wrote it without hesitation.