Page 117 of My Kind of Happy

‘Then you must fight for it like I did!’ she declared, passionately. ‘It wasn’t plain sailing, mind you. And at one point I thought I’d completely cocked it up. But things have a way of working out. I hope they do for you.’

‘So do I.’ I finished the second bouquet while Gina strapped Tabitha back in the buggy and handed the little girl a beaker.

I helped her back outside with the buggy and said goodbye, my mind fizzing with questions. I could try and fight this eviction for Nina, but was the florist’s shop my future? I wasn’t sure if I’d like working here in the depths of winter, although I did love doing the workshops and sharing my love of flowers with others. Was there some way I could focus on that? And what about Nina? She’d thought about closing the business before, perhaps this would be the tipping point for her to walk away completely. I needed to know where she stood as soon as possible. And Sam … I bit my lip; I had good intentions about staying friends, but today, the moment he’d mentioned a date, I was putty in his hands. Should I listen to my head or my heart? I groaned aloud and Scamp cocked his head anxiously. I flipped the sign from open to closed and fetched his lead.

‘Let’s go down to the river.’ I clicked my fingers to my ever eager dog. ‘I’ve got some serious thinking to do.’

I made it along the towpath as far as the Riverside Hotel and was just casting my mind back to the day I’d finished off the flowers for Rosie’s wedding when Nina rang me back.

‘Sorry I had to cut you off earlier,’ she said breezily.

‘That’s OK. It was a shock. I’m sorry that I had to deliver such upsetting news, I’m not surprised you hung up.’

‘What are you on about, you daft thing?’ she cried. ‘I had to go because it was all kicking off. Anya is threatening to walk after a massive row with Pete after he called her a heifer; to be fair I don’t think he even thought it was an insult, that’s the level of chivalry we’re dealing with here, and two of the farmers had an actual fight because they’ve both got the hots for Lindsey. The production team of The Kiwi Wants a Wife are having kittens.’

‘Oh.’ I smiled with relief. ‘Actual kittens or …?’

She snorted with laughter. ‘No, although you can’t take anything for granted here. Joe had an entire family of ferrets down his trousers yesterday.’

I cleared my throat, conscious that we needed to get down to business in case she was called away again. ‘Listen, I was talking to Gina about how she fought to save The Evergreens.’

‘Yep. I remember it well. No one thought she’d be able to raise the money to buy it on her own. But she was determined not to let it slip from her grasp.’

‘Maybe that’s what we should do: challenge Sam’s father-in-law?’ I said.

‘Um … we could. I suppose.’ Nina huffed and puffed and I could hear the frustration in her voice. Finally, she said, ‘What do you think?’

‘Remember I told you that after Freddie died, reading his letter made me appreciate that although his life had been too short, it had been well lived but I couldn’t say the same for myself?’ I began.

‘Yes, of course I do, I remember that letter almost word for word, it’s one of the most profound things I’d ever heard,’ she replied.

‘Ah, thanks.’ My heart pinged with warmth for her. ‘Well, now that’s my goal: to look back at my life with no regrets and be proud of what I’ve done. And I guess you’re in the same position. You’ve seen another side to the world and the question is, will coming back to Barnaby to carry on running Nina’s Flowers make you happy?’

There was a deadly silence on the other end of the line.

‘Think about it,’ I said, gently. ‘There’s no need to rush into a decision.’

She took a deep breath. ‘I don’t need to think about it. I know Nina’s Flowers is my company and I should want to save it but … well, I don’t think I do.’

I blinked. ‘Really?’

‘Really,’ she said firmly. ‘There, I’ve said it. Bloody hell, I feel better already!’

I listened while she told me that Pandora had unwittingly done her a favour. Since she’d been in New Zealand, she had become increasingly certain that her future didn’t lie in floristry any more.

‘I guess the thing is,’ she said shyly, ‘I’ve fallen in love.’

I squealed down the phone. ‘Who? Eric, the sound man? Or one of the actual farmers? I know, it’s the virgin, what’s his name?’

‘If you mean Scott,’ she said with a giggle. ‘No, he’s great and so is Joe when he isn’t carrying ferrets about his person, but not them. In fact, not any of them. It sounds silly, but I’ve fallen in love with life, this life, with myself. Being free, having no responsibilities, doing what suits me. I know I still have the shop at the moment and a mortgage and bills to pay. But being away from home has made me realise that I don’t really need all that. I want to see more of the world. I want to travel, maybe work my way round waitressing or fruit picking. Or anything.’

‘You sound so happy,’ I laughed softly. ‘In fact, you sound like my brother.’

‘I am so happy. It’s because of him and you that I’ve dared to let these feelings in. For three of the five years I’ve run the flower shop, I’ve dreamed of getting out of it, but I didn’t want to admit defeat or be seen as a failure. Freddie’s letter pointed out that we get to choose: what we do, where we go, who we love. So that’s what I’m doing.’

I felt a pang for my brother then; I’d always miss him and I’d always be bewildered about the fact that an experienced biker like him had lost his life in a stupid accident, but I was full of pride that he’d managed to inspire both Nina and me after his death.

‘So,’ Nina continued, ‘I vote we shut the shop when the lease runs out and from now until then, all the shop’s profits go straight to you to pay back the loan you gave me. How does that sound?’

I smiled with surprise. ‘It sounds like a very simple solution.’

‘Simple is best in my opinion,’ she said airily. ‘So is that a plan?’

I told her it was fine with me. We talked for a few more minutes about shop matters and I explained the rush behind Laura and Hamish’s wedding.

‘If it’s OK with you, I’m going to stay on another couple of weeks after the end of the show and do a bit of travelling, but I’ll be back to help with the wedding, seeing as you helped me with the last one. It can be our last hurrah. Right, I’d better go. I’m going to take a leaf out of your book and write a happy list.’

Scamp and I took a slow walk back to the shop. I’d never added anything other than flowers to mine. Perhaps it was about time I did.