Page 10 of My Kind of Happy

Chapter Four

I ran out onto the pavement in the dark and looked left and right, searching the line of parked cars along Pineapple Road until I found Hamish’s. Laura was already out of the car by the time I’d reached it, her worried face lit by the orangey glow of the street lamps.

‘Friends?’ she asked softly.

‘Always.’ I threw my arms around her neck and drew her close. ‘Forgiven?’

‘Always,’ she replied.

And we both sighed with relief.

My spirits lifted. Sometimes things could be that simple. We headed back, pausing to collect Scamp who’d gone to sniff his old front door. In the kitchen, Hamish had put the flowers in the sink in water and was making tea. Laura went straight to him, touching the nape of his neck tenderly and then pulled me into their orbit for a group hug.

I pushed down the thought that from now on I’d be the third wheel in this relationship and concentrated on the happiness that was radiating from them both.

‘I’m glad we’ve cleared the air,’ I said. ‘But sad it needed doing.’

‘Ditto,’ said Laura. ‘And I promise if we go to that spa again, I’ll even go hula-hooping with you.’

‘Deal.’ I grinned and we both laughed at Hamish’s startled face.

‘And now we’re going to clear Freddie’s room,’ he said, clapping his hands together. ‘Because that’s another thing which needs doing.’

I blinked at him. ‘Right now?’

‘Yep.’ He handed us mugs and strode purposefully out into the hallway and up the staircase.

‘No time like the present,’ said Laura, grabbing my hand. ‘Before you have a chance to talk yourself out of it again.’

Scamp, excited by such unusual activity, danced ahead of us.

My pulse speeded up as Hamish paused outside Freddie’s closed door. He was right; I’d been avoiding this job for months. And doing it spontaneously meant that I wouldn’t have time to think about it.

He looked at me steadily. ‘Ready?’

‘Ready,’ I said gruffly.

Laura’s comforting hand squeezed my waist.

Hamish twisted the doorknob, the heart of my brother’s domain opened up and a tremor of emotion rippled through me. Laura and I followed him inside. She snapped on the light and Hamish crossed to the window to close the curtains.

It was cold in here; the radiator had been turned off and both Laura and I shivered.

The leather and aftershave and engine oil that had made up my brother’s unique scent still lingered.

‘It smells like he’s still here,’ I murmured, turning around to see everything.

His double bed had been stripped and the duvet and pillows had been piled at one end of the mattress. Mum had done it the week of the funeral, before I’d begged her to leave the rest of his room intact. The magnetic board above his desk had overlapping layers of notes and ticket stubs and photographs pinned to it; a row of battered trainers formed a border underneath the window. A wardrobe, some drawers and a bookshelf, all crammed with Freddie’s possessions, possessions which I’d never in a million years have rifled through without his permission.

I felt dizzy thinking about it. Laura appeared back at my side.

‘You OK?’

‘Not really,’ I said, with a ghost of a smile. ‘Maybe we’ll just do one drawer tonight if you don’t mind?’

‘I’ll go and find bin bags from the kitchen,’ said Hamish and bounded back out of the room.

The thought of piling Freddie’s things into a bin bag stole the breath from my lungs. I sat down heavily on the chair at his desk. Suddenly I just wanted this over with as quickly as possible. Scamp slunk in and after investigating the only room in the house he’d never been in, he flopped down at my feet. By the time Hamish had returned with a roll of bin bags, Laura and I had pulled out the bottom drawer of Freddie’s desk and were staring into it.