Page 17 of A Trial By Blood

Mags moved to the bed and cupped the side of my face, shaking her head. “Nah, that’s you, Roe. It’s always been you.” She pressed a kiss to my hair. “See you later, okay?”

I swallowed thickly and nodded, then watched as she walked out the door, my heart in my throat.

Ronan didn’t come up right away, and I thought I knew why. Mom had cornered him. When he finally walked in, and those gorgeous eyes came to me, he gave away nothing. He never did.

“What did she…say to you?” I asked.

His brow lifted.

“Mom, when you came in.”

“She told me to have a care with you.” His expression didn’t change. “I didn’t understand what she was saying. I’m always careful with you.”

I smiled at him, and his gaze on my mouth became intense. “Yes, you are. A-always.”

Mom poked her head around the door. “We’re heading out now, sweetheart. We’ll only be a few hours at most.” Her eyes were soft, and I could see her reluctance to leave.

I nodded.

“Love you, sweet girl,” she said, then she bustled off, calling everyone to hurry up.

There was a flurry of sound, of movement, then the door was slammed shut. A minute later, cars started, and everyone left. And the house was engulfed in silence.

Ronan walked to the side of the bed. “Are you sure you want to go through with this, Rose?”

I nodded as I looked into his violet eyes. I loved them. They were cold but exquisitely beautiful, and despite how emotionless that gaze was, they were reassuring. He had no idea that those eyes falling on me the second he walked in the room, waiting for it, reveling in it, was one of the things that had kept me going this long. I was positive of it.

He sat. And this time, it was he who took my hand, offering me physical comfort. His eyes were still emotionless, but he was going to give me what he thought I needed, even if he didn’t understand it, even if he didn’t want or need it himself.

“How would you like me to do it?” he asked, his voice impossibly deep.

For once, my face didn’t heat; there was no shame or embarrassment. My emotions felt raw. This was the last time I’d be with him, and I was going to ask for what I wanted. “Will you h-hold me when you do it?”

“Yes,” he said instantly.

He kicked off his shoes, drew back the covers, scooped me up, then he got onto the bed with me in his arms. He carefully pulled the covers over my legs, bringing them up to my chest. “Is this okay?”

“It’s…perfect.”

His expression was solemn as he stared down at me. “Where would you like me to feed from, Rose?”

I lifted my hand to the side of my throat. “Here.”

His Adam’s apple slid up and down, and he nodded.

It was a struggle, but I lifted my hand to his jaw. I’d wanted to touch it for a long time. It was strange to touch him this way, and wonderful. He’d obviously shaved that morning, but I could feel the stubble already there. He said nothing, just sat there and let me touch him. “I’m so g-glad you came…into my life, Ronan.”

“I’m glad as well, Rose,” he said.

I wasn’t sure if he truly knew what that felt like, but he’d come back every day for over a year. Something brought him here to me, and whatever it was, whatever he felt when he came here, I was grateful for.

Now was not the time to hold anything back, and I couldn’t die without saying what was in my heart. “I know you don’t understand l-love, romantic…or otherwise—”

“Luna tried to explain it,” he said. “It’s a good feeling. It gives pleasure beyond the physical, yes?”

“Yes,” I whispered and brushed my thumb over his firm lips. I mustered all my remaining strength, I needed to get this out, all of it. “I n-need you to know that…I’m in love with you, Ronan. N-not as a sister loves a brother…but as a female loves a male.” I took a ragged breath. “You are the only male…I have ever loved, the only one I will ever love…and the months we’ve spent together have made the u-unbearable…bearable.” I held his violet gaze. “If I could have l-lived a full life…I’d want to live it with you.”

CHAPTER 5