Page 20 of Double Booked

“She started working at his company a few months ago. He said he felt an instant connection to her. Supposedly, he tried ignoring it, but then Vanessa confessed she was attracted to him. He swears they didn’t act on it, but he became emotionally attached to her, and he wanted to explore his feelings.”

“Explore his feelings. He actually said that?”

“Yes.”

“What an ass.”

“Thank you!” She picked up the beer bottle and took another swig. “In other words, he wanted to have sex with her, right?”

He let out a long sigh and looked pained. “I think so. Yes.”

Surprisingly, his agreement didn’t make her feel any worse. It only affirmed what she already knew. “So by calling it an emotional affair, he was trying to let me down easy.”

“I guess so.”

“He should have just told the truth.”

“Would you have wanted him to admit he wanted to have sex with another woman?”

She gazed at him for a long moment, noticing all the variations of color in his eyes. He had beautiful eyes. “Probably not.”

“He must have loved you, or at least cared deeply about you, since you were together for so long. I’m sure it was hard for him to tell you, just like it was hard for you to hear.”

She narrowed her eyes at him.

“I’m not making excuses for the guy. He’s still a jerk. I’m just being honest.”

She sighed. “It still sucks.”

“Yeah.”

“I want to hate him, and mostly, I do.”

“But part of you still loves him.”

She winced. “I don’t know. Sometimes, I think I was more in love with the idea of being in love than with him. Does that make any sense?”

He shrugged. “I’m not sure. I’ve never really been in love.”

Her eyes bugged out. “What? Never?”

He took a drink before answering. “No. I’ve been infatuated and in lust, but that’s different.” He gazed at her for a few beats. “You look like you don’t believe me.”

Since they were being honest, she continued down that path. “I’m just surprised. I mean, you’re young, smart, and attractive in an outdoorsy way.”

He burst out laughing. “An outdoorsy way?”

She waved her hand over him. “You know, flannels, jeans, messy hair.”

“Messy hair? I like to think of it as artfully styled.”

She laughed, enjoying the lightness that accompanied it. “It looks like you styled it for a few minutes and then gave up, but that’s okay. A lot of women like that look.”

He raised his eyebrows. “But not you?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“It was implied.”