Page 63 of With You

I pick my phone back up and take a few deep breaths before going back into the studio. Amelie stands with the photographer looking through the photos on her laptop, a wide smile on her face as she points out her favourite shots.

Seeing her like that settles something inside me, and I walk over to them, plastering a smile on my face as I join them. Amelie wraps her arm around mine, intertwining our fingers together as her other hand circles my bicep. She clings to me as the photographer goes through a couple of reference photos she wants me to try imitating, just like she did with Amelie before she started her shoot.

I nod along, but my brain isn’t fully processing anything as I try to think of how I can avoid going to this meeting. Amelie lets go of me so that I can move to the centre of the backdrop, and the photographer starts directing me into the positions she wants. It takes me multiple attempts to get any of them right, and it’ll be a miracle if we can get any usable shots.

Once the photographer has given up on me, we move on to the joint poses. She shows us references for those, too, the dancers on the screen twisting their bodies around each other, contorting into all sorts of poses that she wants us to replicate.

We take our positions for the first one, Amelie hooking one leg above my shoulder while she rises en pointe, creating a straight line from one foot to the other. I support her with my arm as she arches backward, bracing my other hand on her calf next to my face as I rest it against her knee. I extend one leg to the side, the other planted firmly to keep Amelie and me both balanced as we hold the position long enough for the picture to be taken.

We go through more poses, each one harder than the last, as I start to lose focus, my mind fully preoccupied as it replays the conversation with my parents.

“Can we take a break?” Amelie says, once we’ve finished another shot.

“Sure, let’s take five,” the photographer says, going over to her laptop to check over the photos.

Amelie pulls me aside, tucking us into a corner of the studio as her hand finds mine.

“Are you okay?” she asks, looking up at me, a crease between her brows and her mouth slightly downturned.

“I’m fine,” I tell her, giving her the best smile I can muster. I don’t want her to worry about whatever I’m dealing with. There isn’t a point in telling her when I’m not going to the meeting anyway. “Just a bit tired.”

“We still have to get some shots in our outfits,” she reminds me, and I nod as she reaches up to run her hand through my hair, her nails scraping my scalp and soothing me. “We’ll get it done as fast as possible, and then we’ll go back to your room and sleep.”

She leans up to kiss me, but I drop my head to meet her first, our lips finding each other easily. The promise of falling asleep with her later puts my mind at ease, all other thoughts but that pure comfort escaping me as she smiles up at me.

It only takes us two hours to get through the rest of the shoot, with most of that time spent getting into our outfits. It goes a lot smoother than the first half as my mind relaxes and we find our poses easier, our bodies working together to balance each other out as we hold each position for a few seconds to ensure the best photo can be taken.

The photographer lets us send a few pictures to our phones, and I don’t waste any time changing my lock screen to one of them. Amelie rolls her eyes when I show it to her, but she does the exact same thing just a few seconds later.

When we get back to my room, we fall into the routine that we’ve been doing for the past few weeks. Amelie has spent more and more nights in my bed, my room slowly turning half pink with her things. I changed my pillowcases to silk for her after the second time she slept over when I realised that was better for her hair.

Amelie sits on the edge of my bed as I check the bandages on her feet. Although we haven’t danced today, she’s still gone en pointe a lot and had to hold herself up like that for extended periods to make sure the photos came out well. They’re not as bad as some days, but I unravel them so she can shower without them.

Once she’s showered and changed into a pink tank top and shorts that graze the top of her thigh, she sits back on my bed, resting her feet in my lap again so that I can reapply the bandages. I take care to wrap them delicately, doing my best not to cause her any pain.

When I’m done, she gets into my bed, cosying up under the blanket while I go to shower. I let the frustration of the day wash over me, the hot water almost scalding me to the point where it’s the only thing I feel instead of burning anger at slowly losing control of my own life. I expected this to happen closer to graduation, not in my second year. But reality has started to crash down around me, and I can only pretend for so long that my future hasn’t been set for me.

I get out of the shower and change into a pair of sleep shorts before I go back out. Amelie shuffles closer to the wall, lifting the blanket for me as I settle down next to her. She pulls my arm behind her head, resting on it as she curls into my side. I graze my fingers back and forth across her shoulder, until her breathing evens out and she falls deep asleep.

I might not be able to control what I can do in my future, but I can’t let that stop me from enjoying the present. I pull Amelie closer, tucking her head under my chin as our breathing syncs up, and I fall asleep thinking only of how good it feels to have her in my arms.

Chapter 25

Amelie

The theatre is buzzing with energy. Everyone is gathered together for the final dress rehearsal, the excitement of how close the showcase, just two days away, is almost a living thing surging into the room. We all stand in the wings to watch each other perform, and it’s been a beautiful experience to see so many talented dancers in one space.

The order of the show alternates between solo and pair performances, River and I getting the final pair spot right before the solo that was meant to be mine. I should be more bitter about it, but as time has passed, I’ve realised that it was a blessing in disguise. I lost the solo but I gained River, and that’s something that means far more to me than dancing alone.

He’s still not here, though. Everyone else arrived earlier to get into their outfits and have their hair and makeup done. I thought he might be running a bit late, but the final run-through has started, and he’s nowhere to be seen.

I’ve texted and called him multiple times with no response. In the whole time we’ve been dancing together, he’s never ignored my calls like this. He’s shown up for every other practice, tech run-through, and dress rehearsal this week, so I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t be here.

But time keeps passing, dancers keep finishing their routines, and he still doesn’t show.

Amelie

Have you seen River? He’s meant to be at the dress rehearsal now