Page 12 of Zodiac Monsters

Chapter 4

Twenty-three Years Ago, Three Years Old

“Why don’t you go play with your big brother, Marc?” Mom handed me a beach ball that barely fit between my little arms, and I squished the over inflated plastic in my small hands. I nodded, and the sheer magic of her smile matched my own.

In my earliest memory, at three years old, I ran across the white sand beach, falling over once or twice as the soft ground moved out from under me. For every stumble, I always got back up and reclaimed my beach ball. I was on a mission, after all.

There, standing in the wake of the crashing ocean waves, was my eleven-year-old brother. His skin was darker than mine—he would always tan better than I could—and his arms were crossed as he stared out at the horizon.

A wave broke in front of him, washing as high as his waist, but he was strong and tough. He didn’t even flinch.

“Addy, let’s play.” I said as I held the beach ball over my head, staying at the edge of the water’s reach. He was standing in waves taller than I was, and I was too scared to go to him. He ignored me, and I assumed he simply couldn’t hear me over the noise of the ocean. “Addy!” I tried again, but my voice was lost in water and wind.

Frustrated but stubborn, I flattened my lips and started into the wake. Water washed over my ankles, then dragged away the sand around my feet as it receded. The shift was so rapid, I lost my footing and landed on my hands and knees, dropping the ball into the retreating ocean water. I managed to get back on my feet, and I chased the ball deeper in hopes of reclaiming it before it got too far away. The next wave hit mid-thigh, and the strength of it knocked me backwards onto my butt. Now completely off balance, another shove from the ocean knocked me further backwards onto my back. The position placed the water at my chin, way too close to covering my head.

In a panic, I tried to scamper backwards towards the shore, but the next wave went over my head completely. The rush of salt and foam penetrated my nostrils and my open mouth, and I accidentally inhaled half the ocean straight into my lungs.

I choked and shrieked when a third surge hit, while Adrian glanced over his shoulder at me. I waved a hand in the air in a cry for help.

My big brother looked down at the colorful ball as it reached him, then he snatched it from the water, before he turned to come to my aid.

He stood over me, and I grabbed onto his leg for support, trying to climb back to my feet and regain some control of the situation before I was submerged again. I was tall enough to stand in this, I knew it. But I wasn’t strong enough, and I just needed the stability. I met Adrian’s eyes through terror and desperation, while my wet hands slipped on his ocean soaked calf. His brows creased, and his eyes narrowed.

He kicked his leg to shake me off, dropping me into another wave. The ocean dunked me again, at the same time that Adrian spun and threw my ball back into the ocean as far as he could send it. He casually continued wading back to the dry beach, leaving me to fend for myself in the rising tide.

“Help!” I cried, but that didn’t stop him. If anything, it seemed to make him smile.

“Adrian!” I heard mom scold him, before she rushed to my side. She hoisted my flailing, terrified, thrashing body into the safety of her arms, and she started patting my back.

I choked sea water all over her shoulder, while snot rolled down my face and a mix of tears and salt burned my eyes. Mom carried me back to the shoreline, squeezing me protectively all the while.

When we were on the safety of dry land, she glared at my big brother. “How could you just leave your brother to drown? All he wanted was to play with you.” Ordinarily, she was never one to raise her voice, which made her even scarier when she did. I sniffled harder.

“He’s a vampire.” Adrian scoffed in petulance. “Unfortunately, he isn’t going to die from drowning, or I would have thrown him in with the ball.” He rolled his eyes at me, and I buried my face into the crux of Mom’s shoulder, embarrassed to have been such a burden. He was going to hate me even more after this.

“That’s a horrible thing to say.” She snapped.

I nuzzled into moms warm collarbone, trying to hide my face. “Sorry.” I said quietly. I shouldn’t have tried to make him play with me. I always messed up around him.

Mom rubbed my back to comfort me, but that only seemed to make my big brother even more cross. “He just wants to be your friend, Adrian.”

“Well, I don’t want to be his.” Adrian stood his ground. “He ruined everything, so why should I have to be nice to him?”

Mom opened her mouth, but Adrian shook his head and walked away, not entertaining that conversation for another minute. Somehow, that had me crying worse than I had been in the ocean tide.

I didn’t know what I’d done, but I didn’t know any way to fix it either. Mom frowned and cradled me tighter.

“It’s not your fault, sweetie. You’ve done nothing wrong.” She reassured me. “It’s not fair for him to punish you for things that were never in your control.”

I nodded, not articulate enough to offer any real opinion. All I could rationalize was the idea that, maybe if I tried harder, he would finally want to be my friend. I just had to be better. That was something I could control, right?

Present Day

I shoved my hand through my thick blond hair, and I fisted the strands, tugging to the point of pain in a bid for stress relief. I’d not had a dream like that in years, and I hated rehashing my most banal childhood memories.

Control.

What a farcical fucking concept. Now more than ever, that word haunted me, and my recent obsession was only drilling it deeper into my brain.