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“I need to go get my daughter.” I finally broke the silence not caring about Matthew’s attitude.

“You not getting her right now. You coming to my house so we can have a talk.” He didn’t look at me; just kept his focus on the road. My adrenaline was still pumping through me, and he added to that by firing me.

“Why would I come to your house When you just fuckin’ fired me!” My voice elevated as I kept my eyes glued to his side profile. Ignoring the fact that he smelled good and looked even better. I was ready to do nothing else but stand up for myself. Fear crept into my bones as he cut a car to the right off and then pulled over to the side of the road hitting his hazards. Those wild gray eyes pierced my ass as he gave me an icy glare.

“Watch yo’ tone with me Pray. I ain’t shit like that pussy ass nigga you used of dealing with.” His jaw clenched.

“I don’t have to watch shit, I said I want to go get my daughter nigga!” I snapped my neck and looked at him like he was the crazy one. When he laughed it made me even more angry.

“I don’t want to be around a nigga that fired me.” I spat, getting pissed that he had the nerve to actually fire me. I didn’t know exactly what I was mad at, but I was pissed.

“Oh… you ain’t ditzy no more. You a strong black woman on ya independent shit cause you did some hoodrat shit out in the streets fighting.” He licked his thick cinnamon lips and chuckled. Digging in his ashtray he pulled a blunt out and sparked it, blowing smoke in my face.

“I stood up for myself, I’m not always going to be some weak female,” I argued because I saw nothing wrong with my actions.

“Stood up for yourself? When you got a nigga like me ready to catch a murder charge behind a nigga even talking to you the wrong way? You want to stand up for yourself the wrong way and that’s the problem, which still proves to me that you a ditzy ass broad. You want me to take you to your parent’s house to go get my daughter and you look stupid as fuck. Scratches all on yo’ neck; clothes looking disheveled. Man, I swear bitches is just...” I slapped him hard across his face then went to smack him again. He caught my wrist and twisted it so hard tears immediately fell as I begged him to release my hand.

The look in his eyes scared me and it seemed like he was transforming into someone else before my eyes.

“Bitch if you ever put your hands on me again, I will force myself to fall out of love with yo’ slow ass and kill you!” I stopped breathing for a couple of seconds and just looked at him. This wasn’t Matthew, this had to be Debo.

“You like fucking with my got damn head. You know I love you for whatever fuckin’ reason. Always making my heart do that itchy shit, making me second guess myself cause I know this shit ain’t fuckin’ normal! Now Matthew Michael Brownston does all that easy going sophisticated shit, but Debo! You looking right at Debo nice to fucking meet you. I don’t hit bitches, but I kill them for trying to do me dirty like I should have done that bitch Lakendra. Don’t trigger the killer and me. Keep yo’ monkey ass hands off of me!” He roared. I quickly blinked back my tears and tried to think of the next thing to do but couldn’t as he zoomed out into ongoing traffic like it didn’t faze him that cars were now honking at him.

He switched lanes and drove with so much aggression that I started pleading for him to slow down. I even apologized for slapping him. He ignored me and mumbled all kinds of crazy things to himself.

“Got me looking like a pussy ass nigga. That nigga still breathing after he tried to kill my bitch!” He tapped his forehead with his free hand. It dawned on me that he was triggered by me hitting him. I could see him battling hard with himself as his eyes stayed locked on the road. It dawned on me that Debo was in love with me, but Matthew wanted to do things the right way and give me the proper space and time I needed to heal.

Debo’s aggression made him sexy, but Matthew’s caring side had me wanting to know more about him. He was showing me red flags like Jarei but at the same time deep down, I knew that he would never treat or do me how Jarei did me.

“Debo!” I yelled as he got so close behind a car that it would have been a fender bender.

“What!” He took his eyes off the road and looked over at me.

“Calm down. I’m willing to go wherever you taking me, that way I can get cleaned up. Let’s go to your place first so you can take your medicine since we both agreed to both take our meds and talk to Dr. Scott whenever we start feeling like we are not being ourselves.” I talked carefully hoping to get through to him.

“We were going to my place anyway. I’ll take that stupid ass medicine although I prefer to eat that pussy to medicate myself. You gone get cleaned up and then we go get my daughter?” He said, daughter like it was a question. Like he was waiting for me to reassure him that Heaven was his and Jarei was a thing of the past. It didn’t work that way but for now I would agree.

“Yes, baby,” I said softly. His eyes softened a little as we both remained quiet finishing the ride to his house. I wasn’t sure what I had got myself into, but it seemed like this was how it was supposed to go at the moment. Looking over at Matthew’s shoulders relaxed, it felt like I calmed him down.

We got to his house, and he was back quiet, he opened the door and led me up to the second floor where I entered his massive bedroom. I didn’t know what to expect but it wasn’t this. His mother had to come in and decorate it because everything was neat, and it fit him. His walls were painted tan, his room was very cold, and the proof was the two ceiling fans that spun rapidly from his ceiling. Going into his bathroom I heard him cut the shower water on.

Next, I heard him opening and slamming shut his medicine cabinets. He walked back into the room with two medicine bottles. Piercing me with a pensive look.

“I’m not as bad as my dad.” I tilted my head a little trying to understand what he was getting at. “I’m sorry if I scared you. I don’t want you to run from me. I know that shit I said was foul, but you triggered the fuck out of me hitting me like I was some random nigga off the streets.” He placed the pill bottles on his cherry wood dresser and opened up the tops to both bottles. I watched him intently take two pills with no water. I even heard him crunching on them like it was candy.

“Why not use water?” I asked really wanting to know.

“My dad… whenever he used to have manic episodes he would chew his pills and I guess it helped that shit work faster.” He shrugged and took another.

“Stop doing that, it doesn’t make the pills work faster Matthew. You can overdose and send your body into shock that way. It’s called dose dumping. Look, how bout we get in the shower together and relax ourselves.” I surprised myself at what I was suggesting. He seemed antsy and still on edge.

“You tryna feel me up, when I’m still mad at you sugar mommy.” He smirked and walked up to me grabbing a hand full of my ass. I blushed hard and didn’t fight to remove his hands from my backside. I enjoyed the closeness and intimacy that he offered me whenever he did offer it. Matthewconstantly made me feel like a prized possession. When he stared at me, he made me feel like I was the sexiest woman alive.

“No, I’m just trying to calm your nerves since I triggered them. We both were wrong today. I was wrong for slapping you and you were wrong for firing me and my friends then calling me a bitch.” I made sure to add him firing me in the equation.

“Nah, y’all staying fired. I have to run a successful business and I don’t like exposing who I am. Today I had to do that shit because my manager and the rest of y’all ran off the job stealing companies time by not clocking out just to go fight a lame ass nigga that I could’ve killed weeks ago.”

“Why do you want to kill your friend?” I asked curiously.