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Agatha pushes her full weight onto my other leg, holding me down.
“No! No!”
“I thought you should know,” the sound of Agatha’s voice in my ear only adds fuel to the rage burning inside of me. “When I took Will inside my body, he always cried for you.” She chuckles, digging her long fingernails into my thigh. The delicate necklace dances over my shoulder, as it swings from her throat.
One dry shove, and Remus is inside of me. Having breached my defenses, he revels in his plunder, circling his hips against me on a giddy chuckle that turns my stomach.
“Titus! Titus!” The sound of his name is an unkept promise, broken by the sobs that rip from my chest. He isn’t coming for me. Not now. Not ever again. “No, please! Stop!”
Clamping my eyes shut, I shake my head, willing myself somewhere else. Please, God, take me away from this. Take me away!
Their laughter grows distant.
The pressure against my body disappears to weightlessness.
Darkness swallows me, and I open my eyes to find myself in a paper boat across from Titus, who rows with a paper oar. All around us is a calm, placid, black sea, and the soft glow of the moon above. I remember the song my Nan would sing to me, about the man in the paper boat.
Across the sea, he sails
The man in the paper boat
And in the face of whipping gales
He keeps his ship afloat
He lives to tell his nautical tales
To the girl who loves to dote
The man in the paper boat
The man in the paper boat
“The man in the paper boat,” I whisper, and the sea turns white with thin gray cracks.
Remus pushes off me, his chest heaving with exertion, skin greasy with sweat. The pain between my thighs extends up into my womb, echoing his brutality, and I turn toward the wall again, hoping the blank, white canvas will paint a picture of Titus inside my head.
Titus.
Tears trickle down my temple at the thought of him. How gentle he would’ve been with me. How kind and attentive.
My gentle giant.
Movement about my ankles and wrists fails to break my stare, until my body is lifted up off the bed, and I’m dragged back down hallways and stairwells. The light flicks to darkness, and once again, I’m alone. Trapped in the place halfway between living and dying, where the soul withers away, like the root of a dying vine.
Breathe.
I can almost hear Titus whisper the word in my ear.
Keep breathing. No matter what.
* * *
A sharp light hits my eyes. With a harsh yank, my body is lifted up off the floor and dragged across the cement, up the staircase.
I find myself in Remus’s room again.
This time, I have a small bit of energy to kick and wriggle against my captors, but they’re still stronger. They wrangle me facedown onto the bed, securing my hands and ankles. I let out a scream, and one of the guards shoves a gag into my mouth, the scent of stale water hitting the back of my throat. My pants are yanked down as before, and seconds later, Remus is whispering vulgarities in my ear, as he ruts against me.
