Page 114 of Valentino

No shower, no Carlo…. And no blood.

Fuck.

I drag myself out of bed and walk into the hallway and down the stairs. I go to the kitchen and get a glass of water and with a shaky hand I drink it down.

Visions of me holding the gun to Anna’s head swim back past and I close my eyes to try and block them out.

Why would I dream such a thing?

My heart is still racing, and I take deep breaths to try and bring my vitals back down.

That felt so real.

Too real.

“Hey,” a soft voice whispers as arms slide around my waist from behind. “Are you okay?” Anna says softly before kissing my shoulder blade.

“Yeah.” I keep drinking the water. “I’ll come back to bed in a minute, babe,” I sigh.

“I’ll wait.” She softly smiles up at me. “It’s okay, take your time.”

Does she know how unhinged I feel right now?

Is it that obvious?

I try to calm my breathing, and I slowly finish the glass of water. “Okay.” I nod, but it isn’t okay…how could the shit that’s in my head ever be okay?

“Come on, Val.” She takes my hand in hers and slowly leads me back upstairs and into bed.

For a long time, we lie on our sides and face each other, the moon casts a gentle shadow across the walls, and I can barely see her beautiful face.

She cups my face in her hand as she stares over at me. “What did you dream about?”

I stay silent.

“Val?”

“It doesn’t matter.” I sigh.

“It does to me.”

I brush the hair back from her face as I stare into it. She’s so heavenly, so perfectly wonderful, like an angel. “What are you doing here with me?” I murmur sadly.

Her eyes well with emotion. “I’m about to worship you again.” She leans over and kisses me and beneath it I can feel my heart breaking because damn it, I just killed her in my dreams.

Without a care in the world, I held a gun to her head and I killed her.

And the worst part about it is, I would do it again…if I ever saw them together…my stomach rolls with anxiety at just the thought.

Our kiss deepens and she strokes me and moves closer and closer, but I can’t do this…. This is too raw, too real.

I need distance.

“I need you from behind.” I roll her onto her stomach and hitch her leg up to one side. My fingers slide through the lips of her sex, and her heavy breathing into the pillow sends goose bumps scattering up my spine.

I push my fingers into her body as her tight channel flutters around me. “So wet,” I murmur. Lost somewhere between a physical heaven and a mental hell, my vision begins to blur. I ride her with my hand, and her hips begin to instinctively rise to meet me.

I stroke her long and circular to stretch her out for me until she’s swollen and dripping wet. “Val,” she moans as she rides my fingers.