Page 23 of Fueled Fury

13

Austin

Raising my fist, I pound against the solid wooden door as I glance around. Yeah, I should’ve called, but I was here before I knew it. After another showdown with Eli, I just had to do something—anything—to prove to myself that I actually deserve her. Something to shut out Eli’s voice in my head saying I’ll never be good enough for her. Pounding my fist against the door again, it finally opens and a dark figure emerges, rubbing his eyes.

“What’s going on? Where’s Lainey? Is she okay?” Thomas’s eyes scan the night behind me, his paternal instinct on high alert.

“She’s fine.” Mostly. Just pissed at me. And I’m here to try and get out of the deal I made that will piss her off even further. “I’m out. I can’t do it.”

His hand rubs across his mouth as he steps onto the porch. “We had an agreement. It was remarkably simple terms, so what’s the problem?”

“I can’t do it. I can’t take anything else away from her.”

He twists his head to the side, looking at me. “It’s for her own good.”

“Let her make that choice.”

“She’ll choose wrong, just like I did. I saw it the first time she kart raced and each time afterwards when she’d get into anything with wheels. She has to win. It’s not worth it.” He folds his arms over his chest and leans against the doorframe.

“It’s just amateur racing. It’s not like she’s making a career out of it.”

“But she could. The only reason Randolph hasn’t put her in a car is because I won’t allow him to do so and keep his limbs intact. She proved she had the skills early on, and he knows the McKay name alone would bring the attention that’ll sell. But she won’t be happy. The win will never be enough, and she’ll always chase another while sacrificing everything else. Her mind, her body, even her spirit. I won’t let her get hammered down by the physical difficulties of racing and get finished off by the mental ones. I can’t even get out of bed without downing a handful of pills. My hearing is bad. My memory is shot. And on top of it all, I lost my wife and daughter too. She shouldn’t be behind the wheel because she deserves better than chasing after the impossible.”

His use of the word impossible rubs me the wrong way because that’s what she said she wanted. The impossible—me. “It’s up to her.”

“No. It’s not. You took that decision away from her when you came to me. Warned me about what was going on because you know how much I don’t want her on any track, and deep down, you don’t either if you care anything about her.”

“I stopped her once, but I won’t be able to do it over and over. She will get out there whether we want her to or not.”

“The local authorities won’t shut it down. I’m guessing whoever owns the land has deeper pockets than mine, so find a way to stop her or the agreement is off.”

“I don’t need your money.” But I wanted his blessing. It was never about the money. It’s only been about his approval. The hope that Lainey’s father would approve of me being with his daughter.

“That’s right. But you also don’t want Lainey to know a few details I’m privy to.”

My fists clench as I pull them tightly to my sides. “Either way, I’ll lose her.”

“That might be so, but if you’re anything like me, you’d rather lose her than see her get hurt.” Thomas turns, walks into his house, and slams the door closed behind him.

My feet won’t move. I don’t know which direction to head in because no matter what path I take, I don’t foresee a finish line that we’ll be able to cross together.